Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 23)

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Education is the process of moving from cocksure ignorance to thoughtful uncertainty.

Education Murphy’s Laws

You can't win; You can't break even; You can't quit.

Murphy’s Laws

Of two possible events, only the undesired one will occur.

Murphy’s Laws

Never worry about the bullet with your name on it; instead, worry about shrapnel addressed to 'occupant.’

Conflict Government Military Murphy’s Laws War

The only imperfect thing in nature is the human race.

Murphy’s Laws People

Never read any book in which the author’s name appears in gold or silver on the cover.

Books Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

When you are over the hill, you pick up speed.

Age Murphy’s Laws Old

If you have always done it that way, it is probably wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

If there is anything disagreeable going on, men are sure to get out of it.

Men Murphy’s Laws People Problems

An easily understood, workable falsehood is more useful than a complex, incomprehensible truth.

Characteristics Honesty Intelligence Lies Murphy’s Laws Truth

He travels fastest who travels alone… but he hasn’t anything to do when he gets there.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Travel

Food consumed standing up always has ten times the calorific intake of food consumed sitting down.

Eating Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

1. Nothing is ever so bad it can't be made worse by firing the coach. 2. A free agent is anything but. 3. Whatever can go to New York will..

Activities Murphy’s Laws New York City Places Sports

Any change looks terrible at first.

Murphy’s Laws

Washing machines only break down during the wash cycle.
Corollary: All breakdowns occur on the plumber's day off.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems

The ideal resume will turn up one day after the position is filled.

Murphy’s Laws Work

Whatever creates the greatest inconvenience for the largest number must happen.

Murphy’s Laws People

Whenever you need to stop at a light to put on makeup, every light will be green.

Autos Murphy’s Laws

Technology is dominated by two types of people: Those who understand what they do not manage and those who manage what they do not understand.

Murphy’s Laws People Science/Weather

1. If reproducibility may be a problem, conduct the test only once.
2. If a straight line fit is required, obtain only two data points.

Murphy’s Laws

It is the essence of grantsmanship to persuade the foundation executives that it was they who suggested the research project and that you were a belated convert, agreeing reluctantly to all they had proposed.

Murphy’s Laws