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humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Murphy’s Laws
(Page 67)
View All Murphys Laws
When you're not in a hurry, the traffic light will turn green as soon as your vehicle comes to a complete stop.
McKee's Law
Autos
Murphy’s Laws
traffic lights
One child is not enough, but two children are far too many.
O'Toole's Axiom
Children
Family
Murphy’s Laws
When in trouble, obfuscate.
Halgren’s Solution
Murphy’s Laws
Confusion
Trouble
Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.
Ducharme's Precept
Murphy’s Laws
Situations
Time
Opportunity
Any plumbing pipes you choose to replace during renovation will prove to be in excellent condition; those you decide to leave in place will be rotten.
Phelps's Second Law of Renovation
Murphy’s Laws
Plumbing
Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet.
Mim's Message
Food/Drink
Murphy’s Laws
Wordplay
People who park on the cast side of a football stadium will invariably have seats on the west side.
Gilbert's Conclusion
Murphy’s Laws
The amount of flak received on any subject is inversely proportional to the subject’s true value.
Potter's Law
Communication
Murphy’s Laws
Criticism
When things are going well, something will go wrong.
Chisholm's Second Law
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
If you can’t navigate a one-level, five-item phone tree, you didn’t need a computer anyway.
Parker's Third Rule of Tech Support
Computers
Murphy’s Laws
Things
Technology
When in doubt, predict that the present trend will continue.
Merkin's Maxim
Murphy’s Laws
Trends
When you drop coins, the pennies will fall nearby, while all the others will roll out of sight.
Anonymous Murphy’s Law
Murphy’s Laws
Coins
Distance
Toothaches tend to start on Saturday night.
Johnson-Laird's Law
Health
Murphy’s Laws
Saturday
Toothaches
Automatic weapons – aren’t.
A Murphy's Military Law
Arms
Military
Murphy’s Laws
A man with one watch knows what time it is; a man with two watches is never sure.
Segal's Law
Murphy’s Laws
Things
Time
Watches
Never argue with a man who buys ink by the barrel.
Greener's Law
Conflict
Murphy’s Laws
Arguments
Newspapers
Good salesmen and good repairmen will never go hungry.
Schenk's First Principle of Industrial Market Economics
Murphy’s Laws
Hunger
Repairmen
Salesmen
The speaker with the most monotonous voice speaks after the big meal.
Collin's Conference Principle
Communication
Food/Drink
Murphy’s Laws
Speech
Conferences
The perceived usefulness of an article is inversely proportional to its actual usefulness once bought and paid for.
Glatum's Law of Materialistic Acquisitiveness
Murphy’s Laws
Things
Purchases
Usefulness
On the TV screen, pure drivel tends to drive off ordinary drivel.
Kitman's Law
Communication
Intelligence
Murphy’s Laws
Speech
Television
Drivel
Any technical problem can be overcome given enough time and money.
Lerman's Corollary: You are never given enough time or money.
Lerman's Law of Technology
Money
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Time
Page 67 of 88
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