Subject: People » Women

The main trouble with women is that they will just not put the seat back up again.

(1961 – ) English actor & comedian
People Women

A man leaves a woman for another woman, but a woman leaves a man for herself.


Men People Relationships Women

Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands… but English women only hope to find in their butlers.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
America Characteristics England Husbands Women

All women dress like their mothers, that is their tragedy; no man ever does, that is his.

English author, actor, humorist & playwright
Appearance Clothing Men People Women

It [feminism] is about a socialist, anti-family political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.

(1930 – ) American Southern Baptist minister, executive & media mogul
Beliefs Stupidity Women

A man is as good as he has to be, and a woman is as bad as she dares.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher
Men People Women

Dancing is a wonderful training for girls, it’s the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it.

(1890 – 1957) author & journalist
Activities Dance Education Girls Men People Women

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
Autos Occupations People Situations Women Work

All women marry beneath them.

Marriage Murphy’s Laws Women

[With women] it’s like God made a little package; it’s all tucked in with hospital corners and stuff; and with men, it’s like God started to make a bow, and the phone rang.

(1969 – ) American stand-up comedian & actress
Men People Women

Any girl can be glamorous… all you have to do is stand still and look stupid.

(1913 – 2000) Austrian-American actress, mathematician & inventor
Appearance People Women

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.

(1942 – ) American author and teacher
Intelligence Men People Women

Maybe we weren't at the Last Supper, but we're certainly going to be at the next one.

(1920 – 1998) lawyer, congresswoman, & women's movement activist
People Women

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good… luckily, this is not difficult.

(1896 – 1975) Canadian mayor (Ottawa) & feminist
Men People Women

A woman’s always younger than a man at equal years.

(1806 – 1861) English poet
Age Men People Women

You know that look women get when they want sex… me, neither.

(1958 – ) standup comedian, actor, game show host & photographer
People Sex Women

Women don’t respect salad eaters.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Men People TV/Movie Quotes Women

Among men, sex sometimes results in intimacy; among women, intimacy sometimes results in sex.

(1901 – 2000) English author
Men People Sex Women

No doubt exists that all women are crazy, it’s only a question of degree.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Intelligence People Women

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.

(1953 – ) comedian & actor
Autos People Things Women

At the age of eleven or thereabouts women acquire a poise and an ability to handle difficult situations which a man, if he is lucky, manages to achieve somewhere in the later seventies.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics Men People Women