Subject: People » Women (Page 2)

Are Women Human?

Book Titles People Women

Man does not control his own fate; the women in his life do that for him.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Men People Women

I admit to spending a fortune on women, booze and gambling… the rest I spend foolishly.

(1919 – 1985) Scottish comedian & actor
Alcohol Money Women

I'd never buy my girl a watch… she's already got a clock over the stove.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball People Relationships Sports Women

“Ocean’s Eleven” would never work with women because two would keep breaking off to talk shit about the other nine.

(1982 – ) American comedian, actor, writer & producer
People Women

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Appearance Body Women

The reason there are so few female politicians is that it’s too much trouble putting make-up on two faces.

Australian comedian & actress
Characteristics Government People Politicians Women

Women prefer men who have something tender about them – especially the legal kind.

Men Money People Women

During the feminist seventies men were caught between a rock and a hard-on; in the fathering eighties they are caught between good hugs and bad hugs.

(1936 – ) novelist, essayist & columnist
Conflict Men Past Women

A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Men Things Time Women

Many men and women enjoy popular esteem, not because they are known, but because they are not known.

(1741 – 1794) French writer
Men People Women

Feminism is the worst thing that happened to woman… our job used to be no job. – Feminism

(1982 – ) American actress, stand-up comedian & writer
People Women

Old ladies in wheelchairs with blankets over their legs, I don’t think so… retired mermaids.

(1964 – ) English comedian
Age Old People Women

Nothing with a plug on it, nothing worn directly next to the skin, no clothing that will turn out to be too small rather than too big, and nothing that you actually want for yourself and are trying to disguise as a gift.

Men Murphy’s Laws People Things Women

A woman’s mind is cleaner than a man’s; she changes it more often.

(1863 – 1935) British-born American writer, artist & illustrator
People Women

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Appearance Body Fat People Women

In a way an umpire is like a woman. He makes quick decisions, never reverses them, and doesn't think you're safe when you're out.

American baseball umpire
Baseball People Sports Women

A man leaves a woman for another woman, but a woman leaves a man for herself.


Men People Relationships Women

A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers after four kisses.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Alcohol Food/Drink Men People Women

There’s a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there’s a hell of a lot more to being a mother than most people suspect.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Family Mothers People Women

My coach said I ran like a girl, I said if he could run a little faster he could too.

1972 – ) American soccer player
Sports Women