Subject: Places (Page 2)

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison.

(1903 – 1966) English writer
Education England Places School

The English never smash in a face; they merely refrain from asking it to dinner.

(1910 – 1997) American writer
England Food/Drink Insults Places

Ignorant people in preppy clothes are more dangerous to America than oil embargoes.

(1932 – ) Trinidad-born British writer
America People Places

Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Books Communication Intelligence New York City Reading/Writing

The smallest interval of time known to man is that which occurs in Manhattan between the traffic signal turning green and the taxi driver behind you blowing his horn.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Autos New York City Places

I just got back from the Middle East, where I performed for 15,000 men – and then I did my comedy.


Entertainment Places Sex

First of all, it's not that big, so I'm pretty sure a guy came up with that name.

comedian, writer, actor & producer
Men People Places

If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Money Places World

New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time… most unsolved.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Conflict New York City Places

If banks are so good with numbers, why are there always eight windows and three tellers?

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Places

There are more acres of forestland in America today than when Columbus discovered the continent in 1492.

(1951 – ) American conservative radio talk-show host
Lies Places Stupidity

The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you have to shave twice a day.

(1900 – 1965) diplomat & Democratic politician
America Appearance Government Places President

Fortissimo at last!

(1860 – 1911) Austrian composer
Entertainment Music Places

In Tulsa, restaurants have signs that say, 'Sorry, we're open.’

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Food/Drink Places

The typical West of Ireland family consists of father, mother, twelve children and resident Dutch anthropologist.

(1911 – 1966) Irish novelist, dramatist & columnist
People Places

The thing I love about Vegas is that it’s a melting pot; it’s like working Ellis Island.

(1926 – 2017) American stand-up comedian & actor
Places

I've always tried to be a good American citizen, so I have made it a point not to learn any other language but English.

stand-up comedian
America Communication Language People Self

We used to write essays like: “What I'm going to be if I grow up.”

(1923 – 1966) stand-up comedian, writer, social critic & satirist
Places

An optimist in Canada is someone who thinks things could be worse.

(1942 – ) Canadian politician
Canada People Places

Given the unlikely options of attending a funeral or a sex orgy, a true Irishman will always opt for the funeral.

(1928 – 2002) Irish playwright, novelist & essayist
People Places

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
America Entertainment Government Military Music Places