Subject: Problems » Failure (Page 2)

Washing machines only break down during the wash cycle.
Corollary: All breakdowns occur on the plumber's day off.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems

In this world there are winners and losers – and, of course, ‘the others’, who comprise the majority.

(1967 – ) English comedian
Failure People Success

Dear Randolph, utterly unspoilt by failure.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Failure Insults

Trying is just the first step toward failure.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Failure TV/Movie Quotes

The great advantage of being in a rut is that when one is in a rut, one knows exactly where one is.

1867 – 1931) English novelist
Failure Problems

No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Age Emotions Failure Friends

Reality continues to ruin my life.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Failure Life Problems

If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of failure.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Failure Misspokements Speech Success

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success!

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Failure Friends Old People Success

Trying is the first step towards failure.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Failure Problems Situations

The theory seems to be that as long as a man is a failure he is one of God's children, but that as soon as he succeeds he is taken over by the Devil.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Beliefs Failure God Success

He's a man who was a failure until he was 40 years old, which looks really good on your resume – if you're a comic.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Failure Problems

The most dangerous strategy is to jump a chasm in two leaps.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Failure Problems Situations

Failure has gone to his head.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Characteristics Failure Insults Problems

Office machines that function perfectly during normal business hours will break down when you return at night to use them for personal business.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems Things

The most difficult light bulb to replace burns out first and most frequently.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems

It is not enough to succeed, others must fail.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Failure Success

Authorization for a project will be granted only when none of the authorizers can be blamed if the project fails but when all of the authorizers can claim credit if it succeeds.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Success

Success can be insured only by devising a defense against failure of the contingency plan.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Success

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Failure

Mistakes are often the stepping stones to utter failure.

Failure Mistakes Problems Proverbs