Subject: Sports (Page 87)

Opening games make me nervous; to tell the truth, I’d rather open with our second game.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Misspokements Sports

I only know how to play two ways: reckless and abandon.

American basketball player
Basketball People Self Sports

A mediocre season for Nelson Piquet as he is now known and always has been.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

Dave Wottle has completely misjudged this race… and here comes Wottle!

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

Pitching always beats batting — and vice-versa.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Sports Yogi-isms

Incompetence should not be confined to one sex.

American basketball player & coach
Basketball Sports

Our offense is like the Pythagorean theorem: There is no answer!

American basketball player
Basketball Misspokements Sports

What do you have when you've got an agent buried up to his neck in sand? … Not enough sand.

(1941 – ) American basketball executive
Basketball Sports

I know it's said that I can't punch, but you should see me putting the cat out at night.

boxer
Boxing Sports

I’m no different from anybody else with two arms, two legs, and 4,200 hits.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports

Sugar Ray Leonard's retirements last about as long as Elizabeth Taylor's marriages.

professional boxing promoter
Boxing Sports

Putting allows the touchy golfer two to four opportunities to blow a gasket in the short space of two to forty feet.

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66

Golf Headlines Sports

Golf is more fun than walking naked in a strange place… but not much.

(1924 – 2003) American comedian & actor
Golf Sports

You may be right, but it hasn’t reached his legs yet!

Scottish football player & manager
Sports

He'll have a lot of fun. George will keep him in stitches.

boxing physician
Boxing Sports

The only athletic sport I ever mastered was backgammon.

(1803 – 1857) English writer
Sports

On the road when you go downstairs for coffee in your underwear, they throw you out of the kitchen.

baseball player
Baseball Sports

His face looks like a closed fist.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Appearance Baseball Sports

I don't have anywhere to put my elbows when I putt now.

professional golfer
Golf Sports

That guy has muscles in places most people don't have places.

American basketball broadcaster
Appearance Basketball Body Sports