Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 25)

George: Oh, sir, just one thing – if we should happen to tread on a mine, what do we do?

Blackadder: Well, normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump 200 feet into the air and scatter yourself over a wide area.

(1955 – ) English actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Insurance is like marriage – you pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back.

(1946 – ) American actor
Marriage TV/Movie Quotes

If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing!

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes Work

I don’t have to take this abuse from you, I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

(1950 – ) American actor & comedian
TV/Movie Quotes

Woody: What do you say to a cold one, Norm?

Norm: See you later, Vera [his wife]; I’m going to Cheers.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Squid pro quo.

(1971 – ) American actress
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

I’ve got drinks piling up on my desk and a stack of pills I have even opened yet!

(1958 – ) American actress & singer
Alcohol TV/Movie Quotes

I had to go by the drug store to get some marital aids: breath mints for you and Wild Turkey for me!

(1946 – ) American actor
Marriage Sex TV/Movie Quotes

Leonard: Our babies will be smart and beautiful.

Sheldon: Not to mention imaginary.

(1973 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

[to campers] Attention. Here’s an update on tonight’s dinner. It was veal. I repeat, veal. The winner of tonight’s mystery meat contest is Jeffrey Corbin who guessed “some kind of beef.”

(1950 – ) American actor & comedian
Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

If I had enough money to pay your back salary, I’d fire you.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
TV/Movie Quotes

No, I think that was when Abraham Lincoln signed the Declaration of Independence. Ya know, “Fourscore and seven years ago.”

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

If he's so smart, how come he's dead?

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Intelligence TV/Movie Quotes

I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Insults TV/Movie Quotes

When he tells you he wants to exchange ideas, what he really wants is to exchange fluids.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Sex TV/Movie Quotes

You’re a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wanna make 14 dollars the hard way?

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Insults TV/Movie Quotes

Besides me, who would point out that your teeth have turned the same color of yellow as your underwear and that you have more hair in your nose than on your head?

(1954 – ) American actress & singer-songwriter
TV/Movie Quotes

How about tellers? You take tellers. They never tell you anything. They always ask questions. And interest, there's nothing interesting about it at all. It's boring. Oh and then the trust department, they got all the pens chained down to the tables. What kind of trust is that? – Banks

(1924 – 1985) American actor & television director
TV/Movie Quotes

Ned, I would love to stay here and talk with you… but I’m not going to.

(1950 – ) American actor & comedian
Communication Conversation TV/Movie Quotes

Edward Lewis: You can’t charge me for directions!

Vivian: I can do anything I want to baby, I ain’t lost.

(1967 – ) American actress & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

You know what they say, misery is the best company.

(1923 – 2013) American actress
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes