Author: Anonymous Page 128

The best way to get over a guy is to get under a new one!

Dating Men Relationships Sex

Prejudiced people are all alike.

Characteristics People

If what you don't know can't hurt you, she's practically invulnerable.

Education Insults

Beer… so much more than just a breakfast drink.

Beer Food/Drink

They're in the trenches; they're on the horse and they're riding it.

Mixed metaphors

Diplomat: If you have the advantage over someone, and you lead him to think that he has the advantage over you, without giving him the chance to take advantage of you.

Definitions Government

Couldn’t find his rear with his hands in his back pockets

Expressions Fools Intelligence Stupidity

Waiter: A guy who believes money grows on a tray.

Definitions Occupations Work

Zigzag: The shortest distance between two drinks.

Alcohol Definitions Food/Drink

They tried to make me the escape goat.

Malaprops

Medical Insurance: What allows people to be ill at ease.

Wordplay

Igloo: An icicle built for two.

Definitions

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case; coincidence?

Alcohol Beer Food/Drink

This snowball is coming down the mountain with a full head of steam.

Mixed metaphors

“I clubbed a diamondback snake with a spade,” Tom said heartlessly.

Tom Swifties

Antiques: Furniture that is too old for poor folks but the right age for rich people.

Definitions Things

A lot of good arguments are spoiled by some fool who knows what he’s talking about.

Intelligence

“There’s nothing wrong with demons,” Tom said implicitly.

Tom Swifties

Just keep your eye on the pie.

Malaprops

Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

Fools Intelligence

Clarification: To fill in the background with so many details that the foreground goes underground.

Definitions