Subject: Government » Politicians (Page 5)

The difference between Democrats and Republicans?… Democrats remind us that life is unfair, and Republicans make sure it is.

American comedian & writer
Government Politicians

Practical prayer is harder on the soles of your shoes than on the knees of your trousers.

(1858 – 1932) American physicist, physician & humorist
Government Politicians

Bureaucrat: A politician who has tenure.

Definitions Government Politicians

Politicians are wedded to the truth, but like many other married couples they sometimes live apart.

(1870 – 1916) British writer
Government Politicians Truth

Statesman: A politician who is held upright by equal pressure from all directions.

Definitions Politicians

When a politician gets an idea, he usually gets it wrong.

Ideas Murphy’s Laws Politicians

It takes nerve to be a Democrat, but it takes money to be a Republican.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Politicians

The bosom friend of senators and congressmen was about as daring as an early Shirley Temple movie.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Government Insults Politicians

The statesman shears the sheep; the politician skins them.

(1858 – 1932) American physicist, physician & humorist
Government Politicians

Statesman: A politician away from home.

Definitions Politicians

Government is too big and too important to be left to the politicians.

(1901 – 1986) diplomat & economist
Government Politicians

Politicians are people who get sworn in and cursed out!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Government Politicians

I could not stand the strain of having to be right all the time.

(1921 – 2004) English actor & author
Government Politicians

Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don't understand, such as working for a living.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Government Politicians Work

The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Characteristics Government Honesty Politicians

I don't know what was wrong with my television last night, but I was getting C-Span and the Home Shopping Network on the same station, and I actually bought a congressman.

(1951 – ) American comedian & writer
Congress Entertainment Government Politicians Television

The general rule is that a democratic politician had better not be right too soon.

(1889 – 1974) American intellectual, writer, reporter & political commentator
Government Politicians

According to reports, President Bush and John Kerry have combined $23 million left over from the 2004 presidential campaign, while Ralph Nader recently discovered some old gum in his hair.

(1971 – ) American actress, comedian, producer & writer
Elections/Voting Politicians TV/Movie Quotes

Liberty doesn't work as good in practice as it does in speeches.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Politicians

Once a man wants to hold a public office, he is absolutely no good for honest work.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Occupations Politicians Work

Since a politician never believes what he says, he is quite surprised to be taken at his word.

(1890 – 1970) French president, general & statesman
Characteristics Government Honesty Politicians Truth