Subject: Proverbs


Short sayings that express a simple truth based on experience or common sense and often offer practical advice. Here are some humorous ones.

To err is human, to forgive is human.

Even a broken clock is right twice a day.

Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow.

Never buy a car you can’t push.

Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

Justifying a fault doubles it.

One drink is just right; two is too many; three are too few.

It is not a fish until it is on the bank.

God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers.

When you have only two pennies left in the world, buy a loaf of bread with one, and a lily with the other.

One meets his destiny often in the road he takes to avoid it.

The most dangerous food is wedding cake.

Speak the truth, but leave immediately after.

The wages of sin is death – but the working conditions are good.

Absence makes the heart go wander.

Only mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the noonday sun.

When all men say you are an ass it is time to bray.

Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

If you are a host to your guest, be a host to his dog also.

A tree never hits an automobile except in self defense.

Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you.

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