Subject: Age (Page 24)

If you live to be ninety in England and can still eat a boiled egg they think you deserve the Nobel Prize.

English author, actor, humorist & playwright
Age England Old Places

Whatever a parent does is wrong.

Failure Family Murphy’s Laws Parents Problems Young

I’m at the stage of life when if a girl says no to me, I’m profoundly grateful to her.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Age Old Sex

My body is dropping so fast, my gynecologist wears a hard hat.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Age Body Doctors Old

Teenagers: People who express a burning drive to be different by dressing alike.

Age Definitions

What most persons consider as virtue, after the age of 40 is simply a loss of energy.

(1694 – 1778) French author, humanist & satirist
Age Old

I'm thirty years old, but I read at the thirty-four-year-old level.

(1955 – ) actor & comedian
Age Communication Reading/Writing

She has discovered the secret of perpetual middle age.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Age Insults

By the time a man finds greener pastures, he’s too old to climb the fence.

Age Old Situations

If youth but had the knowledge and old age the strength.

Age Proverbs Young

If you eat one apple a day for 80 years, you won't die young.

(1919 – ) American sportswriter
Age Death Food/Drink Health

The hands on my biological clock are giving me the finger.

(1961 – ) American stand-up comedian
Age People Self Time

The really frightening thing about middle age is that you know you’ll grow out of it.

(1924 – ) American actress & singer
Age

My secret to staying young… having no sense of time.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Age Time Young

I’m getting pretty worried; my girlfriend hasn’t gotten her period… and she’s already 14.

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Age Girlfriends People

He was either a man of about a hundred and fifty who was rather young for his years, or a man of about a hundred and ten who had been aged by trouble.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Age Insults

Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew Up

Age Appearance Old Signs

Dinah [Shore] formed a foundation to locate missing senior citizens by putting their pictures on prune juice bottles.

(1919 – 2006) American comedian & actor
Age Food/Drink Old People

As I understand President Bush's Medicare plan, it provides for unlimited coverage for anyone over 72 whose parents can pass the physical.

(1932 – ) American political satirist & comedian
Age Government Health Old

She is so old… she was the waitress at the last supper.

Age Exaggerations Old

He's as old as some trees.

Canadian hockey player & coach
Age Hockey Old Sports