Subject: Communication » Language (Page 11)

When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author

Synonym: A word you use when you can’t spell the other word.

Do people in Australia, call the rest of the world, "Up Over"?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer

Its important to use apostrophe's right.

Positive: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

I used to be in a band called ‘Missing Cat’… you probably saw our posters.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer

Elector: One who enjoys the sacred privilege of voting for the man of another man’s choice.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author

I will not go down to posterity talking bad grammar.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist

The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.

(1969 – ) comedian & actor

When in doubt, ascribe all quotations to Bernard Shaw.

(1944 – ) English writer & broadcaster

If I seem out of it tonight, it's 'cause I'm hooked on phonics.

comedian

I sometimes throw in a couple of swears just to keep the Christian right off my tail; I wouldn’t want to be the tea party’s go-to comedian.

(1970 –) American stand-up comedian

I want to take one of those English as a Second Language courses – just go in and blow everybody away on the first day.

(1962 – ) American actor & comedian

Where there's a will, there's an inheritance tax.

Our language is funny – a fat chance and slim chance are the same thing.

Sometimes people come up to me and they'll be like, 'In Italy, it's pronounced 'Bir-Bee-Lya’ … and I'm like, 'In America, you're annoying.

(1978 – ) American comedian & writer

Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

We have really everything in common with America nowadays, except, of course, language.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet

I bought a dictionary, and the first thing I did was look up dictionary… it said “you’re an asshole.”

(1973 – ) American comedian