Subject: Communication (Page 3)

Before the invention of the alphabet, filing was impossible… or very easy.

(1972 – ) English standup comedian, writer & actor
Communication Language

Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions Language

If you don't know what a mammogram is, it is not a woman with big breasts who works for Western Union.

American stand-up comedian, television writer & actor
Communication Language

1. All's well that ends.
2. A penny saved is a penny.
3. Don't leave things unfinishe

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws

Holland lies so low they're only saved by being dammed.

(1799 – 1845) English writer
Communication Language Places

The reason most people talk to themselves is because they’re often the only ones who will listen.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Communication Speech

A man talking sense to himself is no madder than a man talking nonsense not to himself.

(1937 – ) British playwright & screenwriter
Communication Intelligence People Self Speech

He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.

(1844 – 1912) Scottish poet, novelist & literary critic
Communication Intelligence Science/Weather

Sex Education: Sermon on the mount.

Definitions Sex Wordplay

When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped.

(1899 – 1974) French screenwriter, teacher & journalist
Communication Situations Speech Time

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Communication Language

I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

Language Science/Weather

Physician: One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Health Language

How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Things Wordplay

The triumph of sugar over diabetes.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor
Communication Insults Reading/Writing

Be sincere; be brief; be seated.

(1882 – 1945) 32nd U.S. president
Communication Situations Speech

Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping a rose petal down the Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo.

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Books Communication Reading/Writing

Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

comedian
Communication Food/Drink Language

Diagnosis: A physician's forecast of the disease by the patient's pulse and purse.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Health Language Money

I don’t own a cell phone or a pager; I just hang around everyone I know, all the time.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Communication

This book fills a much-needed gap.

(1900 – 1986) American teacher & translator
Books Reviews/Criticism