Subject: Communication (Page 74)

The only reason for being a professional writer is that you can’t help it.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Communication Reading/Writing

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain—and most fools do.

(1888 – 1955) American writer, lecturer & developer of self-improvement skills
Characteristics Communication Fools Intelligence

Me and my wife met at a Castanet class… we clicked.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Marriage Wives

Hearsay: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

Communication Definitions Speech

In a restaurant with seats which are close to each other, one will always find the decibel level of the nearest conversation to be inversely proportional to the quality of the thought going into it.

Communication Conversation Murphy’s Laws Speech

If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.

(1925 – 2007) humorist & columnist
Communication Government

Why should I give my readers bad lines of my own when good ones of other people’s are so plenty?

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Communication

Censor: A man who knows more than he thinks you ought to.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
Communication Definitions Language

You want to know how your girl will treat you after marriage, just listen to her talking to her little brother.

(1911 – 1980) humorist, writer, television host & journalist
Communication Girlfriends Marriage Relationships Speech

Writing is turning one’s worst moments into money.

(1926 – ) Irish American novelist & playwright
Communication Reading/Writing

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Language

I never mind my wife having the last word; in fact, I’m delighted when she gets to it.

(1920 – 2000) American actor
Communication Marriage Speech Wives

I must tell you that the supply of words on the world market is plentiful, but the demand is falling.

(1943 – ) Polish trade-union organizer, human-rights activist & president
Communication

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Anger Characteristics Communication Speech

Madness takes its toll; please have exact change.

Communication Language Proverbs

My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine… (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Books Communication Self

It's strange, isn't it… you stand in the middle of a library and go 'Aaaaaaagghhhh' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an airplane, and everyone joins in.

(1921 – 1984) British comedian & magician
Communication Situations Speech

I don’t want to tell you how much insurance I carry with the Prudential, but all I can say is: when I go, they go too.

(1894 – 1974) comedian, radio & television host
Communication Money

There's always someone willing to disagree with me; but I'm the one who's called controversial.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
Characteristics Communication

I'm looking for loopholes.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Beliefs Reading/Writing Religion

Sex is better than talk… talk is what you suffer through so you can get to sex.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Communication Conversation Sex Speech