Subject: Communication » Wordplay (Page 4)

There was a young man from Peru

Whose limericks stopped at line two.

Communication Wordplay

Who remembers when X Factor was just Roman suncream?

British comedian
Communication Wordplay

If these walls could talk, they'd probably say, "No! Not the nails again! Not the hammer!

Communication Wordplay

I’m the lady who works at Paramount all day… and Fox all night.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
TV/Movie Quotes Wordplay

Nothing risqué nothing gained!

(1933 – 1967) American actress, entertainer & Hollywood sex symbol
Communication Sex Wordplay

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders… I hate necks.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Body Communication People Women Wordplay

Urinalysis: The study of pissed off people.

Definitions Health Wordplay

Archaeologist: A person whose career lies in ruins.

Definitions Occupations Wordplay

Smuggler: One who neglects his duty to his country.

Definitions Wordplay

Today’s subliminal thought is: …

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

“Pickup artists” and “garbagemen” should switch names.

Occupations Wordplay Work

Never position a rock near a hard place.

(1962 – ) English writer
Communication Situations Wordplay

He makes his living from ham to mouth.

(1836 – 1911) English dramatist, librettist, poet & illustrator
Communication Reading/Writing Wordplay

Alarm Clock: Something that makes people rise and whine.

Definitions Wordplay

My girlfriend’s dog died, so to cheer her up I went out and got her an identical one: She was livid… “What am I going to do with two dead dogs?”

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Animals Dogs Wordplay

Farmer: A handy man with a sense of humus.

Definitions Wordplay

I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, he sent me a large goat with a long neck, turns out I phoned dial-a-lama.

(1964 – ) English comedian
Communication Wordplay

My father was a small claims court jester.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Family Fathers Wordplay

Sewing Circle: A group of women who needle each other.

Definitions Friends Wordplay

The baby wakes up in the wee wee hours of the morning.

Children Family Wordplay

Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawn shop?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay