Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Definitions
(Page 6)
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After-Dinner Speaker: A fellow who rises to the occasion – and then stands too long.
Anonymous
Definitions
After-Dinner Speaker
Bull Market: A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
Anonymous
Definitions
Bull Market
Investing
Clichés: Fixtures of speech.
Anonymous
Definitions
Language
Cliches
Dieting: The penalty for exceeding the feed limit.
Anonymous
Definitions
Food/Drink
Dieting
Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Definitions
Shin
Delegate-At-Large: A man at a convention whose wife didn’t accompany him.
Anonymous
Definitions
Delegate-At-Large
Travel Brochure: A trip teaser.
Anonymous
Definitions
Travel Brochure
Dandruff: Chips off the old block.
Anonymous
Definitions
Dandruff
Selfish: Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
Ambrose Bierce
(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics
Definitions
Selfish
Courage: Fear in action.
Anonymous
Definitions
Courage
Fear
Misnomer: The right name for the wrong word.
Anonymous
Communication
Definitions
Language
Misnomer
Cheerfulness: The art of concealing your true feelings.
Anonymous
Definitions
Emotions
Happiness
Cheerfulness
Conservative: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.
Ambrose Bierce
(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Beliefs
Definitions
Conservatives
Liberals
Perfume: Any smell that is used to drown a worse one.
Frank ‘Kin’ Hubbard
(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Definitions
Perfume
Smell
Ice Fishing: Winter fishing method in which anglers use a variety of specialized equipment to catch colds.
Anonymous
Definitions
Ice fishing
Middle Age: A time of life when winking at a girl is closing one eye to reality.
Anonymous
Age
Definitions
Middle age
Hot Pants: Breeches of promise.
Anonymous
Appearance
Clothing
Definitions
Hot pants
Donuts: The only non-negotiable element to a successful meeting.
Anonymous
Definitions
Donuts
Tolerance: That uncomfortable feeling that the other fellow might be right after all.
Anonymous
Beliefs
Characteristics
Definitions
Tolerance
Marriage: The mourning after the knot before.
Anonymous
Definitions
Marriage
Psychiatrist: A head coach.
Anonymous
Definitions
Doctors
Health
Psychiatrist
Page 6 of 78
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