Subject: Food/Drink » Cooking (Page 3)

In order to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.

(1934 – 1996) American astronomer, astrophysicist & author
Cooking Food/Drink Science/Weather

Nouvelle Cuisine, roughly translated, means: I can’t believe I paid ninety-six dollars and I’m still hungry.

Cooking Definitions Food/Drink

Square meals often make round people.

American entrepreneur & author
Appearance Body Cooking Fat Food/Drink

You are always complimented on the item that took the least effort to prepare. Example: If you make roast turkey, you will be complimented on the baked potato.

Cooking Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction: I get to the end and say to myself "well, that's not going to happen.”

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Cooking Food/Drink

Kissing don’t last: cookery do!

(1828 –1909) English novelist & poet
Cooking Food/Drink

We could not have had a better dinner had there been a Synod of Cooks.

(1709 – 1784) English author, essayist, critic, editor & lexicographer
Cooking Eating Food/Drink

My wife’s such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Cooking Food/Drink

Chef: A man with a big enough vocabulary to give the soup a different name every day.

Cooking Definitions Food/Drink Occupations Work

This recipe is certainly silly; it says to separate two eggs, but it doesn’t say how far to separate them.

(1895 – 1964) comedian (wife & partner of George Burns)
Cooking Food/Drink

Preheat: To turn on the heat in an oven for a period of time before cooking a dish, so that the fingers may be burned when the food is put in, in addition to when it is removed.

Cooking Definitions

Char: Common method of cooking over a campfire.

Cooking Definitions

Gourmet: A food fetishist.

Cooking Definitions Food/Drink Occupations

If your next pot of chili tastes better, it probably is because of something left out, rather than added.

Cooking Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

50 Ways to Eat Cock

Animals Book Titles Cooking Food/Drink

I think that women just have a primeval instinct to make soup, which they will try to foist on anybody who looks like a likely candidate.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
Cooking Food/Drink People Women

My wife can’t cook at all. She made chocolate mousse; an antler got stuck in my throat.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Cooking Food/Drink

Don’t you think the road commissioner would be willing to pay my wife something for her recipe for pie crust?

(1872 – 1933) 30th U.S. president
Cooking Food/Drink

The one ingredient you made a special trip to the store to get will be the one thing your guest is allergic to.

Cooking Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

I don’t even butter my bread… I consider that cooking.

American socialite
Cooking Food/Drink

Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother's tasted better the day before.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Cooking Eating Food/Drink Mothers