Subject: Food/Drink (Page 23)

A burrito is a sleeping bag for ground beef.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink

There’s many a slip twixt the cup and the lip.

Alcohol Food/Drink Proverbs

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first; by the second day, you’re off it.

(1916 – 1987) television actor & comedian
Food/Drink

A drunkard is like a whiskey-bottle, all neck and belly and no head.

Alcohol Food/Drink

A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink

The key to eating healthy is not eating any food that has a TV commercial.

(1978 – ) American comedian & writer
Eating Food/Drink

Abstainer: The kind of man you wouldn’t want to drink with even if he did.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor
Alcohol Food/Drink People

Beer with no alcohol — what a waste; that is like a nun with a D-cup.

(1958 – ) American actress & stand-up comedian
Alcohol Beer Food/Drink

The cow is of the bovine ilk: One end is moo, the other, milk.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Animals Food/Drink

I don’t like meals for one; it’s not that they make me feel lonely… it’s that they’re not big enough.

(1975 – ) English comedian
Food/Drink Self

One drink is just right; two is too many; three are too few.

Alcohol Food/Drink Proverbs

I spilled some vodka on the carpet, and I vacuumed it up, and the vacuum got drunk. I had to take the Hoover to detox.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Alcohol Food/Drink

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

(1899 – 1961) author & journalist
Alcohol Food/Drink

The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off; I shot the happiest 83 of my life.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Alcohol Golf Sports

Diet: selection of foods for people who are thick and tired of it.

Definitions Food/Drink

The two-headed boy in the circus never had such a headache.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink

He was a bold man that first ate an oyster.

(1667 – 1745) Irish satirist & essayist
Food/Drink

Leonard: Why are you learning Chinese?

(1975 – ) American actor
Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

There is one thing more exasperating than a wife who can cook and won’t, and that’s a wife who can’t cook and will.

(1874 – 1963) American poet
Cooking Food/Drink Marriage Wives

We were the country that has more food to eat than any other country in the world, and with more diets to keep us from eating it.

Food/Drink Places

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you.

(1941 – 2012) American novelist, producer, screenwriter & director
Cooking Food/Drink