Subject: Food/Drink (Page 30)

When someone you greatly admire and respect appears to be thinking deep thoughts, they are probably thinking about lunch.

Food/Drink Intelligence People Thinking

Patsy: What will you drink if you stop drinking?
Edina: I shall drink water.
Patsy: [Blank look]
Edina: It’s a mixer, Patsy, we have it with whisky.

(1958 – ) English comedian, screenwriter & actress
Alcohol Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later you're hungry again.

(1941 – 2003) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink

Angels carry drunkards on their arms.

Alcohol Food/Drink Proverbs

There is no difference between someone who eats too little and sees Heaven and someone who drinks too much and sees snakes.

(1872 – 1970) British philosopher, mathematician, historian & social critic
Alcohol Food/Drink

I can’t think of anything worse after a night of drinking than waking up next to someone and not being able to remember their name, or how you met, or why they’re dead.

(1969 – ) American actress, comedian, producer & writer
Alcohol Intelligence Memory Situations

This recipe is certainly silly; it says to separate two eggs, but it doesn’t say how far to separate them.

(1895 – 1964) comedian (wife & partner of George Burns)
Cooking Food/Drink

Yeah… I remember my first beer.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Alcohol Beer Food/Drink

The item you had your eye on the minute you walked in will be taken by the person in front of you.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

I eat like a vulture… unfortunately the resemblance doesn't end there.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Appearance Eating Food/Drink

Marge, I’m going to miss you so much; and it’s not just the sex; it’s also the food preparation.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

A hotel mini-bar allows you to see into the future and what a can of Pepsi will cost in 2020.

(1954 – ) American comedian, writer & musician
Food/Drink Future Money Time

Our rabbi is so poor that if he didn’t fast every Monday and Thursday, he’d starve to death.

Eating Food/Drink Money Poverty

Prohibition makes you want to cry into your beer and denies you the beer to cry into.

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Alcohol Beer Food/Drink Government

Woody: What’s up?

Norm: The warranty on my liver.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Alcohol TV/Movie Quotes

I never drink coffee at lunch, I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon.

(1911 – 2004) 40th U.S. president & actor
Food/Drink Situations Sleep

I think Foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Activities Food/Drink Games

I went to a pizzeria, I ordered a slice of pizza, the f**ker gave me the smallest slice possible; if the pizza was a pie chart for what people would do if they found a million dollars, the f**ker gave me the “donate it to charity” slice.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink

The French drink to get loosened up for an event, to celebrate and event, and even to recover from an event.

French commission of alcoholism
Alcohol Food/Drink People Places

I drink therefore I am.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink Wordplay

They didn't hesitate: Wendy's, McDonald's, Pizza Hut, and Burger King.

Denver Bronco team nutritionist
Food/Drink Football Sports