Subject: Intelligence » Memory

My fairy Godmother once asked me if I’d rather have a long penis or a long memory… I forget what my answer was.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Intelligence Memory

Memory and teeth grow weaker with time.

Intelligence Memory Proverbs

I saw a commercial on late night TV, it said,“Forget everything you know about slipcovers,” so I did, and it was a load off my mind; then the commercial tried to sell me slipcovers, and I didn’t know what the hell they were.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Entertainment Memory Television

Everything looks bad if you remember it.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Memory TV/Movie Quotes

Senility: The pleasantly rueful experience of forgetting what we’ve forgotten.

Age Definitions Intelligence Memory Old

One thing you will probably remember well is any time you forgive and forget.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Intelligence Memory

A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Intelligence Memory

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it.

(1533 – 1592) French writer
Intelligence Memory

A man always remembers his first love with special tenderness, but after that he begins to bunch them.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Emotions Intelligence Love Memory

Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Intelligence Memory

In no time, it will be a forgotten memory.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Communication Memory Misspokements Speech Time

I constantly walk into a room and I don’t remember why.; but for some reason, I think there’s going to be a clue in the fridge.

(1964 – ) Canadian stand-up comedian, actress & television host
Intelligence Memory

 It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.

History Memory Murphy’s Laws

I have an amazing ability to forget.

(1925 – 2005) American baseball player & manager
Baseball Intelligence Memory Sports

Creditors have better memories than debtors.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Intelligence Memory

I am in the prime of senility.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Age Memory Mind Old

Right now I’m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time — I think I’ve forgotten this before.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Health Memory Situations

Bo Derek turned down the role of Helen Keller because she couldn't remember the lines.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Entertainment Insults Memory People

Many a man fails as an original thinker simply because his memory is too good.

Intelligence Memory Wisdom

Women and elephants never forget an injury.

Intelligence Memory Murphy’s Laws Women

I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and – I can't remember what the third thing is.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Intelligence Memory