Subject: Intelligence (Page 12)

She's a vacuum with nipples.

(1905 – 1986) Austro–Hungarian-American theater & film director
Insults Intelligence

Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is knowing not to use it in a fruit salad.

Intelligence

The fools in this world make about as much trouble as the wicked do.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Fools Intelligence

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Characteristics Intelligence

An original idea can never emerge from committee in the original.

Ideas Intelligence Murphy’s Laws

He has the lucidity which is the byproduct of a fundamentally sterile mind.

(1897 – 1960) Welsh labor leader & politician
Insults Intelligence

Exercise freaks… are the ones putting stress on the health care system.

(1951 – ) American conservative radio talk-show host
Activities Exercise People Stupidity

A coach isn't as smart as people say he is when he's wins, or as stupid as when he loses.

(1924 – 2012) American football player & coach
Football Intelligence Sports

Sixty years ago I knew everything; now I know nothing.

(1885 – 1981) American writer, historian & philosopher
Age Intelligence

I have never found, in a long experience of politics, that criticism is ever inhibited by ignorance.

(1894 – 1986) British prime minister
Communication Intelligence Politicians

The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Characteristics Intelligence

Don't get insulted, but is your job devoted to spreading ignorance?

Insults Intelligence

Educated Man: One who has finally discovered that there are some questions to which nobody has the answers.

Definitions Intelligence Wisdom

Exhilaration is that feeling you get just after a great idea hits you, and just before you realize what's wrong with it.

(1908 – 1990) English actor
Ideas Intelligence

When you don't know what you are doing, do it neatly.

Characteristics Intelligence

Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.

(1875 – 1965) German/French theologian, organist, philosopher, physician & medical missionary
Emotions Happiness Health Intelligence Memory

The average Ph.D. thesis is nothing but a transference of bones from one graveyard to another.

(1888 – 1964) American folklorist, writer & newspaper columnist
Education Ideas Intelligence School

His brain is a half-inch layer of champagne poured over a bucket of Methodist near-beer.

(1873 – 1945) journalist & author
Alcohol Insults Intelligence

My father was a simple man; my mother was a simple woman; you see the result standing in front of you, a simpleton.

(1919 – 1985) Scottish comedian & actor
Family Fathers Fools Intelligence Mothers People Self

I have a memory like an elephant; in fact, elephants often consult me.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Animals Intelligence Memory

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Intelligence Marriage Memory