Subject: Life (Page 16)

Coach: Hey Norm, how’s the world been treating you?

Norm: Like a baby treats a diaper.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Life Problems TV/Movie Quotes

I’m no angel, but I’ve spread my wings a bit.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Life Self

If your ship doesn’t come in, swim out to it!

(1925 – 2013) comedian & actor
Life

I’d like the window that says “Are you sure you want to do this? “OK/Cancel” to pop up less often on my computer and more in my real life.

Life Science/Weather

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Life

The good Lord never gives you more than you can handle… unless you die of something.

(1935 – ) American cartoonist
Beliefs Death God Life Problems

Everything takes more time and money.

Life Money Murphy’s Laws Time

Life is a game, the object of which is to discover the object of the game.

Games Life Murphy’s Laws

There are three things in life that people like to stare at: a flowing stream, a crackling fire and a Zamboni clearing the ice.

cartoon character, Peanuts, Charles Schulz (1922 – 2000) cartoonist
Life

I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Life Time

Not only do I not know what’s going on, I wouldn’t know what to do about it if I did.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Life

Life was a funny thing that happened to me on the way to the grave.

(1908 – 1999) English writer
Death Life

Life is a terminal disease.

Health Life

If only we’d stop trying to be happy we could have a pretty good time.

(1862 – 1937) novelist & short story writer
Happiness Life

Do not punish yourself, you deprive the world of its purpose.

(1967 – ) English comedian
Life Self

Life is full of surprises, but never when you need one.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Life

Life is not for everyone.

(1940 – 1994) American writer & performer
Life

The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore; it is not so much a war as an endless standing in line.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Life

Marriage, in life, is like a duel in the midst of a battle.

(1828 – 1885) French novelist, publicist & journalist
Conflict Life Marriage

For fast-acting relief, try slowing down.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer
Life

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Intelligence Life Stupidity Success