Subject: Life (Page 16)

Nietzsche says that we will live the same life, over and over again… Great, I’ll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing… if you can fake that, you’ve got it made.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host

If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there.

(1937 – 2014) American co-host of radio show “Car Talk”

I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician

Life is just one damned thing after another.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher

Life is like a dogsled team; if you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

(1946 – 1994) writer & humorist

The follies which a man regrets most in his life are those which he didn’t commit when he had the opportunity.

I think I’ve discovered the secret of life – you just hang around until you get used to it.

cartoon character, Peanuts (Charles Schulz, 1922 – 2000) creator & cartoonist

My life is so full of surprises, nothing surprises me any more.

(1960 – ) English singer

Kids: get away from the cell phones, get away from the computers, and mail someone a fish before it’s too late.

(1937 – 2014) American co-host of radio show “Car Talk”

The more you complain, the longer God makes you live.

Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

Life is one long process of getting tired.

Life is uncertain… eat dessert first.

(1925 – ) American writer

Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

[doorbell rings] Peg, could you get that? It’s probably the ‘Homeless: It Could Be Worse’ Tour.

(1946 – ) American actor

My life has been full of terrible misfortunes most of which never happened.

(1533 – 1592) French writer

I read somewhere that 26 is too old to still live with your parents; it was on a note, in my room.

comedian

It’s hard to be famous and alive.

(1948 – ) English novelist

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? … in that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the devil’s own satanic herd!

(1955 – ) English actor