Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 24)

View All Murphys Laws

Immature poets imitate, mature poets steal.

(1888 – 1965) British (US-born) critic, dramatist & poet
Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

A martyr is a hero who didn't make it.

Murphy’s Laws

The crucial memorandum will be snared in the out-basket by the paper clip of the overlying correspondence and go to file.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

If you do not understand a particular word in a piece of technical writing, ignore it; the piece will make perfect sense without it.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Understanding

No matter which side of door the cat or dog is on, it's the wrong side.

Animals Cats Dogs Murphy’s Laws

Pocket calculator batteries that have lasted all semester will fail during the math final.

Education Murphy’s Laws School

Fat is lost last where it is wanted the least. Corollary 1: Fat is lost first from areas of high desirability.
Corollary 2: With time fat flows from areas of high to low desirability. – Hal Belknap, M.D.

Appearance Body Fat Murphy’s Laws

No matter how long or how hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it it will be on sale somewhere cheaper.

Money Murphy’s Laws Shopping Time

The cussedness of inanimate objects is beyond understanding.

Murphy’s Laws Things

No matter how many good tables are free, you will always be given the worst available.

Murphy’s Laws

No matter how many hot dogs you consume at home, they always taste better at the ball park.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

The book you spent $20.95 for today will come out in paperback tomorrow.

Books Communication Money Murphy’s Laws

Most jobs resemble a sled dog team: no one gets a change of scenery, except the lead dog.

Animals Dogs Murphy’s Laws Situations Work

If you leave the room, you're elected.

Murphy’s Laws

The Dilbert Principle: People are idiots.

(1957 – ) cartoonist (Dilbert)
Intelligence Murphy’s Laws

If there are only two shows worth watching, they will be on at the same time.

Entertainment Murphy’s Laws Television

Caveats are always* forgotten.
*Caveat: except in rare instances.

Murphy’s Laws

Every organization has an allotted number of positions to be filled by misfits.

Corollary: Once a misfit leaves, another will be recruited.

Murphy’s Laws People

If you don't write to complain, you'll never receive your order. If you do write, you'll receive the merchandise before your angry letter reaches its destination.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing Shopping

Adding manpower to a late technology project only makes it later.

Murphy’s Laws People Time

Them what gets – has.

Murphy’s Laws