Murphy’s Laws | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 55)

If you see a man approaching you with the obvious intention of doing you good, you should run for your life.

Thoreau's Law

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws Good intentions Henry David Thoreau

Sin now – pray later.

Brandstadt's Observation

Murphy’s Laws Prayer Sin

The first bug to hit a clean windshield lands directly in front of your eyes.

Drew's Law of Highway Entomology

Autos Driving Murphy’s Laws Things Bugs Windshield

Bad weather reports are more often right than good ones.

The Weather-Report Rule

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

When things just can't possibly get any worse, they will.

Chisholm's First Corollary to Murphy's Second Law

Murphy’s Laws

The primary function of the design engineer is to make things difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the serviceman.

Anonymous Murphy's Law

Murphy’s Laws Problems Engineers

The compromise will always be more expensive than either of the suggestions it is compromising.

Corollary to Deadlock's Law

Money Murphy’s Laws Compromises Expense

All women marry beneath them.

Astor’s Axiom

Marriage Murphy’s Laws Women (Nancy Astor)

I called my lawyer and said, ‘Can I ask you two questions?’ He said, ‘What’s the second question?

Finagle's Rule

Government Lawyers Murphy’s Laws

Whatever happens, look as if it was intended.

First Rule of Acting

Acting Entertainment Murphy’s Laws Situations

Anyone who says he isn't going to resign, four times… definitely will.

Galbraith's Law of Political Wisdom

Murphy’s Laws Resignation

If your condition seems to be getting better, it's probably your doctor getting sick.

Fifth Principle for Patients

Doctors Health Murphy’s Laws Illness

Confusion creates jobs.

Hoffstedt's Employment Principle

Murphy’s Laws Work Confusion Employment

When you move something to a more logical place, you only can remember where it used to be and your decision to move it.

Alicia’s Discovery

Murphy’s Laws Alicia Dustria

A lone dime always gets the number nearly right.

Phone Booth Rule

Murphy’s Laws Dimes Phone booths

If you volunteer to do a task that nobody likes to do, you'll be expected to do it every time in the future.

Kotowski's Law of Dirty Work

Murphy’s Laws Situations Work Volunteering

If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.

Fifth Law of Applied Terror

Education Murphy’s Laws School Exams

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Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 55)

Grass growing from sidewalk cracks never turns brown.

Halitosis is better than no breath at all.

An expert is anyone from out of town.

If you see a man approaching you with the obvious intention of doing you good, you should run for your life.

Sin now – pray later.

The first bug to hit a clean windshield lands directly in front of your eyes.

Bad weather reports are more often right than good ones.

When things just can't possibly get any worse, they will.

The primary function of the design engineer is to make things difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the serviceman.

The compromise will always be more expensive than either of the suggestions it is compromising.

All women marry beneath them.

I called my lawyer and said, ‘Can I ask you two questions?’ He said, ‘What’s the second question?

Whatever happens, look as if it was intended.

Anyone who says he isn't going to resign, four times… definitely will.

If your condition seems to be getting better, it's probably your doctor getting sick.

Confusion creates jobs.

When you move something to a more logical place, you only can remember where it used to be and your decision to move it.

A lone dime always gets the number nearly right.

If you volunteer to do a task that nobody likes to do, you'll be expected to do it every time in the future.

If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.