Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 70)

View All Murphys Laws

The chief cause of problems is solutions.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

Murphy’s Laws

After you’ve mailed your last card, you will receive a card from someone you overlooked.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

1. Dust breeds 2. One's roommate (who has early classes) has an alarm clock that is louder than God's own. 3. When one has an early class, one's roommate will invariably enter the space late at night and suddenly become hyperactive, ill, violent, or all three.

Murphy’s Laws

If a taxpayer thinks he can cheat safely, he probably will.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws Taxes

Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will establish yourself as an expert.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Situations

Every great idea has a disadvantage equal to or exceeding the greatness of the idea.

Ideas Intelligence Murphy’s Laws

Every employee begins at his level of competence.

Murphy’s Laws Work

The correct advice to give is the advice that is desired.

Murphy’s Laws Opinion

You know you're getting old when everything dries up or leaks.

Age Murphy’s Laws Old

Happiness is a warm puppy with an empty bladder.

Animals Dogs Murphy’s Laws

If you drop something, it will never reach the ground.

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Problems

The candy bar you planned to eat on the way home from the market is hidden at the bottom of the grocery bag.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping

It always takes longer than you expect, even when you take Hofstadter's Law into account.

Murphy’s Laws Time

The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.

Murphy’s Laws Stupidity

Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.
Corollary: Corresponding errors will show up in the duplicate while the boss is reading it.

Communication Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems

Needs are a function of what other people have.

Murphy’s Laws

A carelessly planned project takes three times longer to complete than expected; a carefully planned project takes only twice as long.

Murphy’s Laws Time

A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.

Military Murphy’s Laws

It (housework) expands to fill the time available plus half an hour: so obviously it is never finished.

Housework Murphy’s Laws

A man with one watch knows what time it is; a man with two watches is never sure.

Murphy’s Laws Things Time