Murphy’s Laws | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 81)

The first time you go out after your wife’s birthday, you will see the gift you gave her marked down fifty percent.
Corollary: If she’s with you, she’ll assume you chose it because it was cheap.

Murphy's Second Law for Husbands

Husbands Money Murphy’s Laws Shopping Wives Birthdays Gifts

If you find something you like buy a lifetime supply – they’re going to stop making it.

Gerhardt's Law

Murphy’s Laws Things Lifetime supply Production

Any new activity will cause more trouble than you can possibly imagine.

Bouchier’s Columbus Principle

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations (David Bouchier)

You will save yourself a lot of needless worry if you don't burn your bridges until you come to them.

First Rule of Negative Anticipation

Murphy’s Laws Situations Time Burning bridges Worry

If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.

Finagle's First Law

Murphy’s Laws Success Experiments

The enemy invariably attacks on one of two occasions:
1. When you’re ready for them. 2. When you’re not ready for them.

A Murphy's Military Law

Military Murphy’s Laws Enemies

It's better to retire too soon than too late.

Mosher's Law

Murphy’s Laws Time Retirement

Use it or lose it.

Ford’s Commandment

Murphy’s Laws (Henry Ford)

Expenditure rises to meet income.

Parkinson's Second Law

Money Murphy’s Laws Expenditure Income

In matters of dispute, the bank's balance is always smaller than yours.

Checkbook Balancer's Law

Money Murphy’s Laws Banks

Of two possible events, only the undesired one will occur.

Dude's Law of Duality

Murphy’s Laws

Life is a game, the object of which is to discover the object of the game.

Sanders' Rumination

Games Life Murphy’s Laws

If at first you don’t succeed, read the manual.

Montgomery's Maxim

Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing Manuals

Incompetence tends to increase with the level of work performed. And naturally the individual’s staff needs will increase as his level of incompetence increases.

Riggs’s Hypothesis

Murphy’s Laws Work (Arthur J. Riggs) Incompetence

A clever remark is one you don’t make at the appropriate moment but compose immediately after.

Aunt Emmie’s Second Law

Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech From Owen Elliott’s Aunt Emmie

Every revolutionary idea – in Science, Politics, Art or whatever – evokes three stages of reaction. They may be summed up by the three phrases: 1. It is completely impossible; don't waste my time. 2. It is possible, but it is not worth doing. 3. I said it was a good idea all along.

Clarke's Law of Revolutionary Ideas

Ideas Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People Arthur C. Clarke

Everything is in a state of utter dishevelment.

Wallace's Observation

Life Murphy’s Laws Problems

Never throw away anything unless you know what it came from.

Rawson's Second Law

Murphy’s Laws Things (Hugh Rawson) Parts

To make an enemy, do someone a favor.

McClaughry's Codicil on Jones's Motto

Murphy’s Laws People Enemies Favor

Seven-eighths of everything can’t be seen.

Marshall's Generalized Iceberg Theorem

Murphy’s Laws Situations

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Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 81)

If you need four screws for the job, the first three are easy to find.

The first time you go out after your wife’s birthday, you will see the gift you gave her marked down fifty percent.
Corollary: If she’s with you, she’ll assume you chose it because it was cheap.

If you find something you like buy a lifetime supply – they’re going to stop making it.

Any new activity will cause more trouble than you can possibly imagine.

You will save yourself a lot of needless worry if you don't burn your bridges until you come to them.

If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.

The enemy invariably attacks on one of two occasions:
1. When you’re ready for them. 2. When you’re not ready for them.

It's better to retire too soon than too late.

Use it or lose it.

Expenditure rises to meet income.

In matters of dispute, the bank's balance is always smaller than yours.

Of two possible events, only the undesired one will occur.

Life is a game, the object of which is to discover the object of the game.

If at first you don’t succeed, read the manual.

Incompetence tends to increase with the level of work performed. And naturally the individual’s staff needs will increase as his level of incompetence increases.

A clever remark is one you don’t make at the appropriate moment but compose immediately after.

Every revolutionary idea – in Science, Politics, Art or whatever – evokes three stages of reaction. They may be summed up by the three phrases: 1. It is completely impossible; don't waste my time. 2. It is possible, but it is not worth doing. 3. I said it was a good idea all along.

Everything is in a state of utter dishevelment.

Never throw away anything unless you know what it came from.

To make an enemy, do someone a favor.

Seven-eighths of everything can’t be seen.