Subject: Places (Page 25)

The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
Cooking Food/Drink Places Things

A farm is an irregular patch of nettles bounded by short-term notes, containing a fool and his wife who didn’t know enough to stay in the city.

(1904 – 1979) Jewish-American humorist, author & screenwriter
Definitions Places Things

Isn't it nice that people who prefer Los Angeles to San Francisco live there?

(1916 – 1997) newspaper journalist
People Places

Florida has so many strip clubs, they need to change their state flag to just a brass pole.

(1964 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actress, television host
Places

The world gets better every day – then worse again in the evening.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Places Time World

In Manhattan, every flat surface is a potential stage and every inattentive waiter an unemployed, possibly unemployable, actor.

(1908 – 1999) English writer
New York City Occupations Places Work

In Hollywood now when people die they don’t say, “did he leave a will?” but “did he leave a diary.”

(1946 – ) American actress & singer
Hollywood Places

Where I come from, the valleys are so narrow the dogs have to wag their tails up and down.

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Places

Home: A place where a man is free to say anything he pleases because no one pays any attention to him.

Definitions Places

A trip through a sewer in a glass-bottomed boat.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Hollywood Insults Places

I've seen insects walking around with kneepads.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
Animals Exaggerations Places

We have in England a curious belief in first-rate people, meaning all the people we do not know; and this consoles us for the undeniable second-rateness of the people we do know.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Characteristics England People Places

You want a friend in Washington?… get a dog.

(1884 – 1972) 33rd U.S. president
Age Friends Government People Places

I love Mexico because it’s a giant dollar store.

(1965 – ) American comedian
Places Shopping

Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Housework Situations World

Suburbia: Where they tear out the trees and then name streets after them.

Definitions Places

Drug Kingpin Amado Fuentes died from 9 hours of liposuction and plastic surgery – or, as it's commonly known here in Beverly Hills, natural causes.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Death Health Places

You’re probably aware that Britain stopped evolving gastronomically around the year 1242.

(1977 – ) British political comedian & television host
Food/Drink Places

Canada is all right really, though not for the whole weekend.

(1870 – 1916) British writer
Canada Places

I like my buddies from west Texas; I liked them when I was young; I liked them then I was middle – age; I liked them before I was president; and I like them during president, and I like them after president.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Age Friends People Places President

Hollywood is where they write the alibis before they write the story.

(1908 – 1942) American actress
Hollywood Places