Subject: Places (Page 9)

I can play anywhere; First, Third, Left field… anywhere but Philadelphia.

(1942 – ) American baseball player
Baseball Places Sports

Beware of gifts bearing Greeks.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
People Places Things

I would like to live in Manchester, England; the transition between Manchester and death would be unnoticeable.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Insults Places

Irish people are Italians who can’t dress, Jamaicans who can’t dance.

(1960 – ) Irish singer-songwriter, musician, philanthropist & publicity seeker
People Places

The world is round; it has no point.

writer, humorist, columnist & speaker
Beliefs Places World

We’re not used to weather in June in this country.

professional football player, coach & executive
England Misspokements Places Science/Weather

If you persecute somebody just because they might look a little different, then you are no better than our country's founding fathers.

American comedian & writer
America Characteristics Places

I enjoy being in America: it's fun, you know, because you have, you have so many things we never had in Russia — like warning shots.

(1951 – ) Soviet-American comedian
America Places

I asked the barmaid for a quickie; the man next to me said, 'It's pronounced quiche.'


Communication Food/Drink Places Speech

The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
Cooking Food/Drink Places Things

One of those Canadian proverbs.

professional baseball player
Misspokements Places

I love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Government Money Places

The average Italian…. is a cowardly baritone who consumes 78.3 kilometers of carbohydrates a month and drives about in a car slightly smaller than he is, looking for a divorce.

(1938 – 2007) British writer
People Places

Washington is a much better place if you are asking questions rather than answering them.

Murphy’s Laws Places

If Moses would have walked two more miles, we'd have all the oil.

(1957 – ) American comedian
Places

Where do forest rangers go to “get away from it all?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Places

It was tough growing up in Florida because all my friends were retired.

(1959 – ) American comedian, comedy writer, actor & author
Age Friends Old People Places Young

The boomarang is Australia’s chief export (and then import.)

(1973 – ) American comedian
Activities Games Places

The Austrians are brilliant people. They made the world believe that [Adolf Hitler] was a German and [Ludwig van Beethoven] an Austrian.

(1906 – 2002) Austrian journalist, filmmaker, screenwriter & producer
Places

It is not necessary to have relatives in Kansas City to be unhappy.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Family Insults Places Relationships

I might just fade into Bolivian, you know what I mean?

(1966 – ) American boxing champion
Malaprops Places