Subject: Problems » Accidents (Page 3)

A child will not spill on a dirty floor.

Accidents Children

Accident: A thing that is caused by people, but often causes people.

Accidents Definitions Problems

A dropped power tool will always land on the concrete instead of the soft ground (if outdoors) or the carpet (if indoors) – unless it is running, in which case it will fall on something it can damage (like your foot).

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Things

A paint drip will always find the hole in the newspaper and land on the carpet underneath (and will not be discovered until it has dried).

Accidents Murphy’s Laws

One cannot make an omelette without breaking eggs – but it is amazing how many eggs one can break without making a decent omelette.

Accidents Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems

I am a poor man, but I have this consolation: I am poor by accident, not by design.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Accidents Money Poverty

A valuable dropped item will always fall into an inaccessible place (a diamond ring down the drain, for example) – or into the garbage disposal while it is running.

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Problems

Man is the only kind of varmint who sets his own trap, baits it, then steps on it.

(1902 – 1968) novelist
Accidents Animals People Problems

Some guy hit my fender and I said "be fruitful and multiply" but not in those words.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Accidents Autos Things

If you can laugh at yourself loud and hard every time you fall, people will think you're drunk.

(1963 – ) television host & comedian
Accidents Alcohol Emotions Laughter

You can always hit what you don't aim at.

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Problems

The most delicate component will be dropped.

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Things

The leading cause of hot air balloon crashes is blowing an open flame into a f**king cloth balloon with a basket attached.

(1973 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actor, director & producer
Accidents Problems Things

Experience varies directly with equipment ruined.

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Problems

Most accidents in well-designed systems involve two or more events of low probability occurring in the worst possible combination.

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Problems

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Accidents Life