Subject: Problems (Page 9)

If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a procedure can go wrong and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

When life gives you lemons, just say ‘Fuck the lemons’ and bail.

(1969 - ) American actor, comedian, & screenwriter
Life Problems TV/Movie Quotes

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

(1920 – ) Hungarian writer
Problems

Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.
Corollary: Corresponding errors will show up in the duplicate while the boss is reading it.

Communication Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems

Anytime you wish to demonstrate something, the number of faults is proportional to the number of viewers.

Murphy’s Laws People Problems

Even the youngest of us may be wrong sometimes.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Age Problems Young

If there is anything disagreeable going on, men are sure to get out of it.

Men Murphy’s Laws People Problems

Stuff tends to break when it is loaned or borrowed.

Accidents Problems Things

No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Age Emotions Failure Friends

For one brief moment today I thought I was winning in the game of life… but there was a flag on the play!

cartoon character, Peanuts, Charles Schulz (1922 – 2000) cartoonist
Life Problems Sports

The easiest way to solve a problem is to pick an easy one.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Problems

I led the league in “Go get ‘em next time.”

(1935 – ) American baseball player, sportscaster, comedian & actor
Baseball Failure Sports

To err is human; to admit it, superhuman.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Characteristics Honesty Mistakes Problems

To have a grievance is to have a purpose in life.

(1902 – 1983) American philosopher
Life Problems

I have made mistakes, but have never made the mistake of claiming I never made one.

(1841 – 1918) publisher of the New York Herald
Mistakes Problems

Reality continues to ruin my life.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Failure Life Problems

I love when problems have simple solutions: cold medicine… umbrellas… condoms… tax incentives & subsidies attracting favored industries.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian, television writer/producer & radio host
Problems

Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
Intelligence Problems

I didn't fail the test, I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Failure Problems

If all else fails, try the obvious.

Problems Proverbs Situations

New York is the only city in the world where you can get deliberately run down on the sidewalk by a pedestrian.

(1925 – ) columnist & journalist
Accidents New York City People Places Problems