Subject: Relationships » Dating

Are we simply romantically challenged… or are we sluts.

(1965 – ) American actress, model, singer & producer

A friend tricked me into going to Wimbledon by telling me it was a men's singles event.

American comedian

Never try to pick up a woman who is wearing a Super Bowl ring.

(1949 – 2016) American comedian & television actor

How attractive a given person appears to be is directly proportionate to how unattractive your date is.

Men don’t realize that if we’re sleeping with them on the first date, we’re probably not interested in seeing them again either.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian, television host, actress, & author

You know what they say: ‘Once you go black… your parents don’t talk to you anymore.'

(1981 – ) American Comedian

I went out with this girl the other night, she wore this real slinky number… she looked great going down the stairs.

(1964 – ) English comedian

I wish you'd keep my hands to yourself.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host

I once dated a famous Aussie rugby player who treated me just like a football; made a pass, played footsie, then dropped me as soon as he’d scored.

(1958 – ) Australian author

I met this girl, she was an actress, and she gave me her number; it started with 555.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian

Whenever I want a really nice meal, I start dating again.

comedian

I like to date school teachers; if you do something wrong, they make you do it over again.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

When a man goes on a date, he wonders if he is going to get lucky… a woman already knows.

A man who was loved by 300 women singled me out to live with him… Why? … I was the only one without a cat.

(1952 – ) comedian

Courtesy: The art of yawning with your mouth closed.

Ed, have you noticed that the older you get, the younger your girlfriends get? Soon you’ll be dating sperm.

(1948 – ) comedian, actor, writer, producer & film director

I'd go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer

Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet

He was really into family… he'd never come on the road with me on the weekends 'cause he wanted to spend time with his wife.

(1981 – ) American Comedian

About age 30 most women think about having children, most men think about dating them.

American comedian & motivational speaker

Let's face it: a date is a job-interview, that lasts all night; the only difference between a date and a job interview is: not many job-interviews is there a chance you'll end up naked at the end of it.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor