Subject: Science/Weather (Page 10)

You might think that after thousands of years of coming up too soon and getting frozen, the crocus family would have had a little sense knocked into it.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Science/Weather

What goes up must come down… but don't expect it to come down where you can find it.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer
Science/Weather

My theory [is] that modern science was largely conceived of as an answer to the servant problem and that it is generally practiced by those who lack a flair for conversation.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Science/Weather Speech

It is so hot… I saw two trees fighting over a dog.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

It was a dry rain.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Science/Weather Yogi-isms

So dry the catfish are carrying canteens.

Exaggerations Science/Weather

Free Advice: Bundle Up When Out In the Cold

Cold Headlines

It is so dry… I caught a catfish that had ticks on him.

Exaggerations Science/Weather

Science Fiction: Fairy tales for nerds.

Communication Definitions Science/Weather

I don’t know why I should have to learn Algebra… I’m never likely to go there.

(1942 – ) Scottish comedian, musician & actor
Places Science/Weather

Why are the pictures square if the lens is round?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Science/Weather

Officer, I know I was going faster than 55 MPH, but I wasn't going to be on the
 road an hour.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Autos Science/Weather Things

The only way I'd worry about the weather is if it snows on our side of the field and not on theirs.

Los Angeles Dodgers’ manager
Baseball Science/Weather Sports

I can levitate birds… no one cares.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Animals Science/Weather

It is so hot… chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.

(1844 – 1912) Scottish poet, novelist & literary critic
Communication Intelligence Science/Weather

I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

Language Science/Weather

The progress of science varies inversely with the number of journals published.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing Science/Weather

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Science/Weather

Science: An orderly arrangement of what, at the moment, seems to be the facts.

Beliefs Definitions Facts Science/Weather

It is so hot… Dick Cheney waterboarded himself.

(1947 – ) comedian & television host
Heat Science/Weather