Subject: Sports (Page 7)

We’re all endowed with God-given talents… mine happens to be hitting people in the head.

American boxing champion
Boxing Occupations Sports

When you win you eat better, sleep better and your beer tastes better. And your wife looks like Gina Lollobrigida.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports

A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Golf Sports

What’s one more torpedo in a sinking ship?

American football player
Football Health Sports

A sense of humor and a good bullpen.

(1931 – ) American baseball player & manager
Baseball Sports

Knuckleball: A curveball that doesn't give a damn.

(1909 – 1973) American sports journalist
Baseball Sports

When we played softball, I’d steal second base, feel guilty and go back.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Characteristics Sports

There are only two plays that I know, Romeo and Juliet and put the damn ball in the basket.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Basketball Sports

The only way to ruin a day like this would be to play golf on it.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

Part of the learning curve in Edmonton is learning to hate Calgary.

professional hockey player
Hockey Sports

Gehringer goes two for five on Opening Day and stays that way all season.

American baseball pitcher
Baseball Sports

The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf.

Appearance Body Golf Murphy’s Laws Sports

If I knew the answer to that I'd bet $10,000 on the game and retire from coaching.

Montreal Canadiens coach
Hockey Sports

Kent Abbott is in the on-deck circuit.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Malaprops Sports

We get nose jobs all the time in the NHL, and we don't even have to go to the hospital. 

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

Doctors tell me I have the body of a thirty year old. I know I have the brain of a fifteen year old. If you've got both, you can play baseball.

American baseball player
Appearance Baseball Body Intelligence Sports

I believe in rules… sure I do; if there weren’t any rules, how could you break them?

(1906 – 1991) American baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Characteristics Sports

Here's a six-foot-ten guy in sneakers and the lady's asking me, 'Profession?'


Basketball Occupations Sports Work

The lead is now 6.9 seconds… in fact, it’s just under 7 seconds.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing at you.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Emotions Golf Laughter Sports

When I lost my decathlon world record I took it like a man. I only cried for ten hours.

British Olympic decathlon champion
Sports