Author: Anonymous Page 20

Bisexual: A person who pays for sex.

Definitions

Alimony: The high cost of leaving.

Divorce Marriage

That'll stick out like a red herring.

Mixed metaphors

I'm hungry enough to eat cats and dogs.

Mixed metaphors

Alarm Clock: That which scares the daylight out of you.

Definitions Wordplay

Amateur Athlete: An athlete who is paid in cash, not by check..

Definitions

“Cut it out!” said Tom sharply.

Tom Swifties

Psychiatrists: People with the same problems as anyone else, but with an accent.

Definitions Doctors Health

“I'll have a martini,” said Tom, dryly.

Tom Swifties

It sounds good on paper.

Ideas Intelligence Mixed metaphors

Good Advice: What a man gives when he gets too old to set a bad example.

Beliefs Definitions Opinion

Executive: A man who talks to visitors so the other employees can get their work done.

Definitions Occupations Work

Never judge a book by its title.

Mixed metaphors

Dirt: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

Definitions

Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.

People

Get a new car for your spouse; it'll be a great trade!

Autos Things

He is so fat… I had to take a train and two buses just to get on his good side.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

Marching to the beat of a dead horse

Mixed metaphors

No two people in a car can agree on which window should be open… and how much.

Autos Things

Hell hath no fury like a wet cat.

Mixed metaphors

Why spend astronomical amounts on so-called scientific research to go to another planet?

Mixed metaphors