Author: Anonymous Page 38

“That city will never be rebuilt,” the prophets babble on.


Tom Swifties

“Orgasms are overrated”, said Tom anticlimactically.

Tom Swifties

He was grinnin' like a possum eatin' bumble bees.

Miscellaneous

When it comes to paying, he’s the first to put his hand in his pocket… and leave it there.

Frugal Money

Cantaloupe: Gotta get married in a church.

Definitions Marriage

Synonym: A word you use when you can’t spell the other word.

Definitions Language

Intellectual: A guy who can keep his mind on a book at a beach.

Definitions People

I believe the only time the world beats a path to my door is when I’m in the bathroom.

Situations

“It’s a German song,” Tom lied.

Tom Swifties

She’s so ugly… when she entered an ugly contest the judges said, "No professionals."

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

No two people in a car can agree on which window should be open… and how much.

Autos Things

Delegate-At-Large: A man at a convention whose wife didn’t accompany him.

Definitions

We'd like a room with a southern explosion.

Malaprops

Learned Fool: One who has read everything, and simply remembered it.

Definitions Intelligence

Reducing: Wishful shrinking.

Appearance Body Definitions Wordplay

Prophylactic: A rubber check.

Definitions

“I am removing the lining of my gloves,” Tom deferred.

Tom Swifties

“We can’t let the fire die out,” Tom bellowed.

Tom Swifties

Thrift: Common sense applied to spending.

Definitions Money

Consult: To seek another’s approval of a course already decided upon.

Definitions

Harpist: A plucky musician.

Definitions Entertainment Music Wordplay