Keyword: Advice

Old people love to give good advice; it compensates them for their inability to set a bad example.

(1613 – 1680) French writer
Age Intelligence Old People

Here's some advice for you guys: never hire a clown named Molesto.

stand-up comedian
Beliefs

Don't give a woman advice; one should never give a woman anything she can't wear in the evening.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Clothing People Women

If you want to get rid of somebody, just tell him something for his own good.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Beliefs Opinion

I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

I have a bit of advice for hungry young comedians – eat something.

(1921 – 1984) British comedian & magician
Beliefs Opinion

Those with the best advice offer no advice.

Murphy’s Laws People

Too often, people who want to offer sound advice give more sound than advice!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Communication Intelligence Speech

We hate to have some people give us advice because we know how badly they need it themselves.

Beliefs Opinion

When your mother asks, ‘Do you want a piece of advice?’ … it is a mere formality; it doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no, you’re going to get it anyway.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Beliefs Opinion

A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it is the stupid ones who need all the advice.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Fools Intelligence Wisdom

I always advise people never to give advice.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Beliefs Opinion

Don’t be discouraged if your children reject your advice; years later they will offer it to their offspring.

Beliefs Children Family Opinion

The best time to give advice to your children is while they’re still young enough to believe you know what you’re talking about.

Beliefs Children Family Intelligence Opinion

 If you can tell the difference between good advice and bad advice, you don't need advice.

Murphy’s Laws

Advice is like castor oil, easy to give, but dreadful to take.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Beliefs Characteristics Opinion

If it’s free, it’s advice; if you pay for it, it’s counseling; if you can use either one, it’s a miracle.

(1895 – 1968) Canadian hockey player, coach & general manager
Beliefs Opinion

The one prediction that never comes true is, “You’ll thank me for telling you this.”

(1938 – ) journalist, columnist (Miss Manners)
Beliefs Opinion

We always admire the intelligence of those who ask us for advice.

(1927 – ) American lawyer, activist & public official
Intelligence People

Be moderate in all things, including moderation.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics

The trouble with giving advice is that people want to repay you.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Beliefs