Subject: Food/Drink » Cooking (Page 2)

In a family recipe that you discovered in an old book, the most vital measurement will be illegible.

Cooking Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

I’m not going to say my wife can’t cook, but should toast have bones?

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Cooking Food/Drink

The difference between a chef and a cook is the difference between a wife and a prostitute; cooks do meals for people they know and love, chefs do it anonymously for anyone who’s got the price.

(1954 – ) British writer & critic
Cooking Food/Drink Occupations Work

I’m no cook; when I want lemon on chicken, I spray it with Pledge.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Cooking Food/Drink Self

In order to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.

(1934 – 1996) American astronomer, astrophysicist & author
Cooking Food/Drink Science/Weather

My wife has to be the worst cook; her specialty is indigestion.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Cooking Food/Drink Health Wives

The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
Cooking Food/Drink Places Things

Don’t you think the road commissioner would be willing to pay my wife something for her recipe for pie crust?

(1872 – 1933) 30th U.S. president
Cooking Food/Drink

Do not taste food while you’re cooking… you may lose your nerve to eat it.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Cooking Eating Food/Drink

Rachel: Hey, Mon, look, I’m melting butter.

Monica: That’s great, Rach. You now have the cooking skills of a hot day.

(1964 – ) American actress, producer & director
Cooking Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you.

(1941 – 2012) American novelist, producer, screenwriter & director
Cooking Food/Drink

Romanian-Yiddish cooking has killed more Jews than Hitler.

(1915 – 1977) American actor of stage and screen
Cooking Food/Drink

I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking.

(1919 – 2011) American news commentator & writer
Cooking Eating Food/Drink

In England there are sixty different religions and only one sauce.

(1563 – 1608) Italian Catholic priest
Beliefs Cooking England Food/Drink Places Religion

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Cooking Eating Food/Drink

My wife can’t cook at all. She made chocolate mousse; an antler got stuck in my throat.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Cooking Food/Drink

You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.

(1964– ) American comedian, radio personality, actor, podcaster & director
Cooking Eating Food/Drink

Marge, your cooking only has two moves: Shake and Bake.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Cooking TV/Movie Quotes

50 Ways to Eat Cock

Animals Book Titles Cooking Food/Drink

My wife’s a bad cook; the other night, she fixed alphabet soup – it spelled out “Help!”

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Cooking Food/Drink

Fettuccine Alfredo: Macaroni and cheese for adults.

Cooking Definitions Food/Drink