Subject: Appearance (Page 22)

Being born with a pair of beady eyes was the best thing that ever happened to me.

(1925 – 1989) American actor
Appearance

Amanda: Why are you dressed like that? … Like you’re going to a funeral. Why are you dressed like somebody died?

Wednesday: Wait.

(1980 – ) American actress
Appearance Clothing TV/Movie Quotes

You'll always feel good about your body when you go there – no matter what your body is – because there's always someone there who weighs 350 pounds more than you'll ever weigh.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Appearance Body Fat

I will never give up; I’m in my 14th year of a ten-day beauty plan.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Appearance Self

The prettiest dresses are worn to be taken off.

(1889 – 1963) French poet, novelist, playwright, artist & filmmaker
Appearance Clothing Sex

Shopping tip: You can get shoes for 85 cents at bowling alleys.

American comedian
Appearance Clothing Shopping

I’ve lost seven pounds this week… or, as my girlfriend calls it, ‘the baby’.

British comedian & emcee
Appearance Body

A wino asked me for change… I gave him my shirt.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Appearance Clothing Money

You are 32, you are rapidly approaching the age when your body, whether it embarrasses you or not, begins to embarrass other people.

English author, actor, humorist & playwright
Age Appearance Body

I speak two languages, Body and English.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Body Communication Language

He must have had a magnificent build before his stomach went in for a career of its own.

(1910 – 1997) American writer
Appearance Body Fat Insults

I refuse to think of them as chin hairs; I think of them as stray eyebrows.

Appearance

He is so ugly… robbers give him their masks to wear.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

Phyllis Diller’s had so many facelifts, there’s nothing left in her shoes.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Appearance Body

I saw a guy today who had rings and hooks and pens and antennas hanging out his cheeks and his eyebrows; looked like somebody hit him in the head with a tackle box.

(1973 – ) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Body

The more underdeveloped the country, the more overdeveloped the women.

Appearance Body Murphy’s Laws Places Women World

His face looks like a closed fist.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Appearance Baseball Sports

Ugly as home made sin on a Sunday.

Appearance Ugly

I ain’t afraid to die fat… that’s my pallbearers’ worry.


Appearance Death Fat

His features resembled a fossilized wash rag.

(1925 – 2008) British journalist
Appearance Insults

I'd hire her to haunt a house!

Appearance Miscellaneous Ugly