Subject: Characteristics (Page 39)

Look at him (Bobby Richardson) – he doesn’t drink, he doesn’t smoke, he doesn’t chew, he doesn’t stay out late, and he still can’t hit .250.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball Characteristics Sports

I am the common denominator to all my bad relationships.

(1966 – 2011) American stand-up comedian
Characteristics Relationships Self

The price of purity is purists.

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
Characteristics People

I have never been jealous; not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Characteristics Education Fathers School

If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out.

(1897 – 1976) American novelist, short story & sports writer
Characteristics Golf Sports

Those whose approval you seek the most give you the least.

public relations manager
Characteristics Murphy’s Laws People

Timid? … as timid as a buzz saw.

Characteristics People

How many of you have ever started dating because you were too lazy to commit suicide?

(1956 – ) American entertainer & comedian
Characteristics Dating Relationships

Badness comes in waves.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing… if you can fake that, you’ve got it made.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Characteristics Honesty Life Truth

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

(1864 – 1910) French author
Characteristics Situations

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.

(1667 – 1745) Irish satirist & essayist
Beliefs Characteristics Communication Lies Truth

The trouble with being punctual is that there's nobody there to appreciate it.

(1908 – 1993) American composer, lyricist & writer
Characteristics Time

Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands… but English women only hope to find in their butlers.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
America Characteristics England Husbands Women

Deep down, I'm pretty superficial.

(1922 – 1990) American actress
Characteristics Misspokements

He’d fight an anvil.

Characteristics Expressions

The first time Adam had a chance, he laid the blame on woman.

(1879 – 1964) British politician
Characteristics Women

Don't be so humble – you are not that great.

(1898 – 1978) Israeli prime minister
Characteristics Insults

People who never get carried away should be.

(1919 – 1990) publisher & author
Characteristics Emotions People

He’s so lazy he wouldn’t work in a pie factory.

Characteristics Expressions Work

All general statements are false.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws