Subject: Communication (Page 22)

A lot of people think kids say the darnedest things, but so would you if you had no education.

(1974 – ) Russian-born American comedian, writer & filmmaker
Children Education Family Intelligence Speech

I am not the editor of a newspaper and shall always try to do right and be good so that God will not make me one.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Occupations Work

‘Son, I don’t think you’re cut out to be a mime.’ ‘Was it something I said?’ asks the son. ‘Yes.’

(Daniel Barker) British comedian, voice-artist & actor
Communication Occupations Speech Work

Clairvoyant: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron, namely, that he is a blockhead.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Communication Fools Intelligence

Where there's a will, there's an inheritance tax.

Death Government Language Taxes

We have the power to bore people long after we are dead.

(1885 – 1951) American novelist, short-story writer & playwright
Communication People Reading/Writing Self

To have not shot his friend in the face would have sent a message to the quail that America is weak.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
America Communication Situations

I never lecture, not because I am shy or a bad speaker, but simply because I detest the sort of people who go to lectures and don't want to meet them.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Communication People Speech

Alimony is the curse of the writing classes.

(1923 – 2007) American novelist, journalist & playwright
Communication Marriage Occupations Reading/Writing

I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together; it was riveting.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language

Blurt: To speak the truth.

Definitions Speech

Spent the last 3 days, alone, trying to learn escapology… I need to get out more.

(1980 – ) English magician & comedian
Miscellaneous Wordplay

Interpreter: One who enables two persons of different languages to understand each other by repeating to each what it would have been to the interpreter’s advantage for the other to have said.

Communication Definitions Language

People who use selfie sticks really need to have a good, long look at themselves.

British stand-up comedian, writer & actor
Communication Things Wordplay

Slander: To lie, or tell the truth about someone.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions

Good taste and humor… are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore.

(1930 – 1990) English journalist, author & media personality
Communication

The most valuable quotation will be the one for which you cannot determine the source.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons!

Arms Conflict Military Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

In my youth there were words you couldn’t say in front of a girl; now you can’t say ‘girl.'

(1928 – ) humorist, singer, songwriter & satirist
Communication Language Speech

Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Activities Communication Dance Entertainment Music Speech