Subject: Death (Page 21)

Do you realize we’re only a heart attack away from Bush being president?

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor

I’ll never die in my sleep… I don’t sleep that well.

(1889 – 1966) American humorist, writer, illustrator & cartoonist

I shall look forward to a pleasant time.

(1737 – 1793) American merchant, statesman & patriot of the Revolution

When there's a will, I want to be in it.

I am about to take my last voyage, a great leap in the dark.


I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die; I would have thought the obvious one was "Shout For Help."

(1972 – ) Anglo-Irish comedian, writer & actor

There are many who dare not kill themselves for fear of what the neighbors will say.

(1903 – 1974) English intellectual, literary critic & writer

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.

(1942 – ) humorist & radio broadcaster

My friend died doing what he loved… heroin.

Canadian-American comedian, writer & columnist

I've had eighteen straight whiskies, I think that's the record.

(1914 – 1953) Welsh-born poet & writer

To stop sinning suddenly.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher

Aw, no one's gonna shoot at me.

(1939 – 1963) American assassinator of President John F. Kennedy

A redneck died and left his entire fortune to his beloved wife… she couldn’t touch it until she was fourteen.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality

Give me immortality or death.

Tenant Failed To Give Notice Before Dying

Many of these guys on death row have done heinous things, but when we as a people sink to their level and execute them, then we’re no better than Republicans.

American comedian & writer

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist

With the newspaper strike on, I wouldn't consider dying.

(1908 – 1989) American actress of film, television & theater

Damn it! How will I ever get out of this labyrinth?

(1783 – 1830) Venezuelan military & political leader

I should never have switched from Scotch to Martinis.

(1899 – 1957) film actor

My struggle to remain healthy is gradually killing me.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist