Subject: Death (Page 21)

Suicide is man's way of telling God, "You can't fire me – I quit."

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Beliefs Death God

God will forgive me. It is his profession.

(1797 – 1856) German critic & poet
Last words

If my dead father was alive to hear that, it would kill him.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Death Family Fathers Misspokements Situations Travel

He'd make a lovely corpse.

(1812 – 1870) English novelist
Death Insults

I’m not unwell, I’m f**king dying.

(1932 – 1997) British journalist
Death Last words

Patriotism: The willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons dreamed up by politicians.

Death Definitions

If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Death Life

Every damn fool thing you do in this life you pay for.

(1915 – 1963) French singer & cultural icon
Last words

I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Death Things

How were the receipts today at Madison Square Garden?

(1810 – 1891) American showman, businessman, entertainer & circus founder
Last words

So here it is!

(69 BC – 30 BC) last pharaoh of Ancient Egypt
Last words

Hey, fellas! How about this for a headline for tomorrow's paper? 'French Fries'!

(c.1936 – 1966) American convicted murderer
Last words

When I die, I’m leaving my body to science fiction.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Appearance Body Death People Self

You can be a king or a street sweeper, but everyone dances with the Grim Reaper.

(1953 – 1992) American career criminal & convicted murderer
Last words

I think you're right, Wyatt. I can't see a god damn thing.

(1851 – 1882) younger brother of Deputy U.S. Marshals Virgil & Wyatt Earp
Last words

If you really believe that death leads to eternal bliss, then why are you wearing a seatbelt?

(1967 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Death

I am starting to believe you are not intending to count me amongst your friends.

(1879 – 1936) Spanish comic playwright
Last words

There is no such thing as inner peace; there is only nervousness and death.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Death

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Books Communication Death Reading/Writing

Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow.

(1955 –2011) business magnate, co-founder & CEO of Apple
Last words

Ah, Luisa, you always arrive just as I am leaving.

(1798 – 1866) Italian statesman, novelist & painter
Last words