Subject: Entertainment (Page 22)

Someone came too sooner.

(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist
Entertainment Misspokements Music

It requires a surgical operation to get a joke well into a Scotch understanding.

(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
Entertainment People Places

It makes me look as if I were straining a stool.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Art Insults

Comedy is tragedy plus time!

(1936 – ) American actor, director & screenwriter
Entertainment TV/Movie Quotes

English painter & sculptor Frederic Leighton to James McNeill Whistler: My dear Whistler, you leave your pictures in such a sketchy, unfinished state. Why don't you ever finish them?

Whistler’s reply: My dear Leighton, why do you ever begin yours?

(1834 – 1903) American-born, British-based artist
Communication Entertainment Insults

I was born at the age of twelve on a Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer lot.

(1922 – 1969) American singer & actor
Entertainment People Self

On an average day 7 minutes of news happens. Yet there are currently three full-time, 24-hour news networks.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Entertainment Television

I’m always afraid that somewhere out there, there is one person in the audience that I’m not going to offend!

(1926 – 2017) American stand-up comedian & actor
Entertainment

It’s funny how psychos are always so much scarier when they’re pretty girls.

(1954 – ) British writer & critic
Entertainment Film

An artist is somebody who produces things that people don’t need to have.

(1928 – 1987) painter, printmaker & filmmaker
Entertainment Things

I always thought I'd go to the Oscars, but only as a stalker.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Entertainment Film People Self

I would like to be able to watch the evening news with my family and not have to explain what oral sex means to my wife.

American comedian & writer
Entertainment Sex Television

Milton was probably the best at dealing with hecklers, but then he probably had the most practice.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Entertainment

ESPN is like your family, it’s always there: the networks are like your mother-in-law… they are there on the weekends.

(1931 – 2012) American college football historian & television commentator
Sports Television

Television: A means of getting a babysitter so Mom and Dad can get out to the movies.

Definitions Entertainment Television

When I die, there will be people who send flowers to Ethel Mertz.

(1902 – 1979) American actor
Acting Entertainment

For a director, a musical is a special kind of hell.

(1931 – 2014) German-born American director, producer, actor & comedian
Entertainment

Martha Stewart’s a convicted felon and they gave her another television show… what’s next, the Scott Peterson Fishing Hour?

(1964 – ) American comedian & actor
Entertainment Television

You might be a redneck if… you think 'N Sync is where the dirty dishes go.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Entertainment Music People Rednecks

I wish there was a knob on the TV so you could turn up the intelligence; they got one marked “brightness” but it don’t work, does it?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Entertainment Television

We are paid to have dirty minds.

(1903 – 1986) American film censor
Entertainment Film Occupations Work