Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
Home
About
Categories
Activities
Age
Animals
Appearance
Beliefs
Characteristics
Communication
Conflict
Death
Education
Emotions
Entertainment
Family
Food/Drink
Government
Health
Intelligence
Life
Marriage
Miscellaneous
Money
People
Places
Problems
Relationships
Science/Weather
Sex
Situations
Sports
Success
Things
Time
Work
Additional Categories
Book Titles
Confucius say
Definitions
Epitaphs
Exaggerations
Expressions
Hollywood Squares
Insults
Last Words
Murphy's Laws
Place Names
Proverbs
Reviews/Criticism
Song Titles
Tom Swifties
TV/Movie Quotes
Oops...
Bushisms
Church Bulletins
Classified Ads
Colemanballs
Headlines
Malaprops
Misspokements
Signs
Translations
Yogi-isms
Some Popular Authors
Abraham Lincoln
Alfred E. Neuman
Ambrose Bierce
Benjamin Franklin
Dave Barry
Demetri Martin
Dorothy Parker
Emo Phillips
George Carlin
Groucho Marx
H.L. Mencken
Homer Simpson
Jeff Foxworthy
Jimmy Carr
Joan Rivers
Mae West
Mark Twain
Mitch Hedberg
Oscar Wilde
Phyllis Diller
Richard Lewis
Rita Rudner
Rodney Dangerfield
Steven Wright
Stewart Francis
W.C. Fields
Will Rogers
Woody Allen
View All Authors
Subject:
Exaggerations
(Page 3)
It was so cold… flashers were just describing themselves.
Anonymous
Cold
Exaggerations
Science/Weather
Flashers
He is so fat… I had to take a train and two buses just to get on his good side.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
He is so dumb, blondes tell jokes about
him.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Intelligence
Stupidity
She is so fat… she can't even jump to conclusions.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
It is so hot… the birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
He is so ugly… he has to sneak up on his mirror.
Anonymous
Appearance
Exaggerations
Ugly
She is so ugly… when she walks into a haunted house, she came out with a paycheck.
Anonymous
Appearance
Exaggerations
Ugly
He is so fat… he can't even jump to a conclusion.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
She is so short… you can see her feet on her driver's license picture.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Short
He is so old… when he was in school they didn’t teach history!
Anonymous
Age
Education
Exaggerations
Old
School
She is so old… she used to baby-sit Jesus.
Anonymous
Age
Exaggerations
Old
It is so hot… I saw a squirrel fanning his nuts.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
It was so cold… the politicians had their hands in their
own
pockets.
Anonymous
Cold
Exaggerations
Science/Weather
It was so cold… we had lunch at the "Greasy Spoon" – just for the heartburn.
Anonymous
Cold
Exaggerations
Science/Weather
She is so fat… when you tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
It is so dry… I caught a catfish that had ticks on him.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Science/Weather
Dry
She is so old… she was the waitress at the last supper.
Anonymous
Age
Exaggerations
Old
It is so hot… I saw a chicken lay a fried egg.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
It is so hot… by the time I got home from buying eggs, I had twelve chicks in the bag.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
She is so stupid… she took a blood test and failed.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Intelligence
Stupidity
It is so hot… today I saw a funeral procession pull into a Dairy Queen.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
Page 3 of 6
« Previous
1
2
3
4
5
Next »
Last »