Subject: Government » Law (Page 2)

I've had ample contact with lawyers, and I'm convinced that the only fortune they ever leave is their own.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Government Insults Law Lawyers Money

The scariest guy in prison is the white guy… because he's guilty.

American comedian
Conflict Crime Law People

Judge: Mr Smith, you must not direct the jury. What do you suppose I am on the bench for?

Smith: It is not for me, your honour, to attempt to fathom the inscrutable workings of Providence.

(1872 – 1930) British statesman, politician & lawyer
Law Occupations Work

Isn't it great to live in a society where the penalty for lying to a congressman can be up to 30 years in jail, but the penalty for a congressman lying to you is another two years in office.

(1955 – ) American sportswriter
Beliefs Congress Golf Government Honesty Law Lies

In Scotland we have a verdict ‘not proven;’ that means ‘not guilty, but don’t do it again.’

Law Places

Laws are like cobwebs, which may catch small flies, but let wasps and hornets break through.

(1667 – 1745) Irish satirist & essayist
Government Law

Justice is open to everyone in the same way as the Ritz Hotel.

(1740 – 1819) American lawyer, jurist & politician
Government Law

Many a man is saved from being a thief by finding everything locked up.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Crime Government Law People

1. If the facts are against you, argue the law. 2. If the law is against you, argue the facts. 3. If the facts and the law are against you, yell like hell.

Government Intelligence Law Murphy’s Laws

When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

(1927 – ) American comedian
Government Law

There is a statue of limitation.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Law Malaprops

He’s not technically a lawyer, but he’s got three court cases next week.

Lisa Lampanelli (1961 – ) American stand-up comedian
Law People

The large print giveth, and the small print taketh away.

(1949 – ) American singer-songwriter, composer & actor
Government Law

Scooter Libby was found guilty of perjury, obstruction, and making false statements… or, as the White House calls it, a press conference.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Crime Government Law

I’m the mayor, I can do whatever I want until the courts tell me I can’t.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Government Law

You win some, you lose some, and then there's that little known third category.

(1948 – ) U.S. vice president & politician, author & environmentalist
Elections/Voting Government Law Politics

Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Government Law Lawyers

Criminal lawyer is a redundancy.

Government Law Lawyers

This contract is so one-sided that I am surprised to find it written on both sides of the paper.

(1899 – 1966) British judge
Government Law

Judge: Miss West, are you trying to show contempt for this court?

Mae West: On the contrary, Your Honor, I was doin' my best to conceal it.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Government Law

A jury is a group of twelve people of average ignorance.

(1820 – 1903) English philosopher
Government Intelligence Law People