Subject: Intelligence (Page 32)

A good idea is one that hits the other fellow with a bolt of envy.

Ideas Intelligence

Get the fools on your side and you can be elected to anything.

(1902 – 1963) Danish actor
Elections/Voting Fools Intelligence Politics

I tell you boy, the wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.

(1962 – ) American ventriloquist & stand-up comedian
Intelligence Stupidity

I don’t know why my brain has kept all the words to the Gilligan’s Island theme song and has deleted everything about triangles.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Intelligence Mind Science/Weather

The head never rules the heart, but just becomes it's partner in crime.

(1913 – 1983) journalist & author
Emotions Intelligence

Egotist: A conceited ass who thinks he knows as much as you do.

Definitions Intelligence People Self

When someone you greatly admire and respect appears to be thinking deep thoughts, they are probably thinking about lunch.

Food/Drink Intelligence People Thinking

Success in almost any field depends more on energy and drive than it does on intelligence; this explains why we have so many stupid leaders.

(1920 – 2003) American writer
Intelligence Success

If the converse of a statement is absurd, the original statement is an insult to the intelligence and should never have been said.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Speech

A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it is the stupid ones who need all the advice.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Fools Intelligence Wisdom

Evil and stupidity are randomly distributed.

Murphy’s Laws Stupidity

I have always had a bad memory, as far back as I can remember.


Intelligence Memory

Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student; at least they can find Kuwait.

(1952 – ) American writer & comedian
Education Intelligence Learning

I have never found, in a long experience of politics, that criticism is ever inhibited by ignorance.

(1894 – 1986) British prime minister
Communication Intelligence Politicians

Sometimes a majority simply means that all the fools are on the same side.

(1925 – ) writer
Fools Intelligence People

People who don’t think probably don’t have brains; rather, they have gray fluff that’s blown into their heads by mistake.

fictional character from the book series by A. A. Milne
Intelligence Thinking

A stupid man’s report of what a clever man says is never accurate because he unconsciously translates what he hears into something he can understand.

(1872 – 1970) British philosopher, mathematician, historian & social critic
Communication Intelligence

Information is moving—you know, nightly news is one way, of course, but it's also moving through the blogosphere and through the Internets.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Communication Intelligence

Ever since the young men have owned motorcycles, incest has been dying out.

(1911 – 1991) Swiss playwright & novelist
Intelligence Situations Things

What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement?

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Insults Intelligence

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

(1941 – 2008) British journalist, musician &broadcaster
Intelligence Wisdom