Subject: Life (Page 9)

The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.

(1857 – 1938) American lawyer
Children Family Life Parents

Coach: How’s life treating you Norm?

Norm: Like I just ran over its dog.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer Life TV/Movie Quotes

We live in a world where John Lennon was murdered, yet Barry Manilow continues to put out f**king albums.

(1961 – 1994) comedian
Life

In a perfect world, a fair world, Bob Hayes should be forced to carry a small calf on his shoulder when he runs the dashes…Mark Spitz, in all fairness, would swim with a sea anchor…[and] Ella Fitzgerald must sing every note with a mouth full of Tootsie Rolls.

(1919 – ) American sportswriter
Entertainment Life Places Sports World

They were living high on the cob.

Life Malaprops Money

How young can you die of old age?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Age Death Life Old Young

For fast-acting relief, try slowing down.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer
Life

What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of high living.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Life

When the going gets tough, the tough get going.

1913 – 1983) American college football coach
Life Situations

As life’s pleasures go, food is second only to sex… except for salami and eggs; now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.

(1927 – 2004) American comedian & actor
Eating Food/Drink Life Sex

Good times end too quickly. Bad times go on forever.

Life Murphy’s Laws Situations Time

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing… if you can fake that, you’ve got it made.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Characteristics Honesty Life Truth

Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Life

Life was a funny thing that happened to me on the way to the grave.

(1908 – 1999) English writer
Death Life

Life: A breathing spell.

Definitions Life

If life was a party, he wasn’t even in the kitchen.

(1948 – ) English novelist
Insults Life

After a year in therapy my psychiatrist said to me, “Maybe life isn’t for everyone.”

(1940 – ) American basketball coach
Doctors Health Life

Life is pleasant… death is peaceful; it’s the transition that’s troublesome.

(1920 – 1992) American science and science fiction author & professor
Death Life

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Life Science/Weather

The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.

(1922 – 2003) author & playwright
Health Life

Life: A continuous series of disasters which result in one’s death.

Death Definitions Life