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humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Murphy’s Laws
(Page 6)
View All Murphys Laws
When the product is destined to fail, the delivery system will perform perfectly.
Boyle's Laws - 2
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Things
Products
Unlimited warranties are usually neither.
Shea’s Discovery
Murphy’s Laws
Bill Shea
Warranties
When two people meet to decide how to spend a third person's money, fraud will result.
Gross's Law
Money
Murphy’s Laws
People
No experiment is ever a complete failure – it can always serve as a negative example.
Futility Factor
Failure
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Experiments
The cream rises to the top. So does the scum.
Wellington’s Law of Command
Murphy’s Laws
Any change looks terrible at first.
Principle of Design Inertia
Murphy’s Laws
Change
Any ship can be a minesweeper… once.
A Murphy's Military Law
Arms
Military
Murphy’s Laws
War
Mines
When things just can't possibly get any worse, they will.
Chisholm's First Corollary to Murphy's Second Law
Murphy’s Laws
1. If it is green or it wiggles – it is Biology.
2. If it stinks – it is Chemistry.
3. If it doesn’t work – it is Physics.
Young's Handy Guide to the Modern Sciences
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Science/Weather
Biology
Chemistry
Physics
A high paying rush job comes in only after you've committed to a low paying rush job.
First Law for Freelance Artists
Money
Murphy’s Laws
Work
Rush jobs
Cleanliness is next to impossible.
O'Reilly's Law of the Kitchen
Murphy’s Laws
Cleanliness
1. No matter what they're telling you, they're not telling you the whole truth. 2. No matter what they're talking about, they're talking about money.
Todd's First Two Political Principles
Characteristics
Honesty
Lies
Money
Murphy’s Laws
Truth
Don’t ever be the first, don’t ever be the last and don’t ever volunteer to do anything.
A Murphy's Military Law
Military
Murphy’s Laws
Volunteering
The one who does the least work will get the most credit.
Shapiro's Law of Reward
Murphy’s Laws
Work
Credit
A lone dime always gets the number nearly right.
Phone Booth Rule
Murphy’s Laws
Dimes
Phone booths
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
Murphy's First Corollary
Murphy’s Laws
What really matters is the name you succeed in imposing on the facts – not the facts themselves.
Cohen's Law
Facts
Murphy’s Laws
Science/Weather
Fuses never blow during daylight hours.
Corollary: Only after fuses blow do you discover the flashlight batteries are dead and you’re out of candles, or matches, or both.
Bair’s Ruyle of Lighting
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Fuses
Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.
Robert Benchley
(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Murphy’s Laws
People
Work
Benchley's Law
He who laughs first, laughs last… if nobody laughs in the middle.
Black’s Discovery
Laughter
Murphy’s Laws
Gerrit Blaauw
The most delicate component will be dropped.
Rosenfield's Regret
Accidents
Murphy’s Laws
Things
Page 6 of 88
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