Subject: People (Page 106)

Amateur: One who is always willing to give you the benefit of his inexperience

People

Users: Computer users are divided into three types: Novice users: people who are afraid that simply pressing a key might break their computer. Intermediate users: people who don't know how to fix their computer after they've just pressed a key that broke it. Expert users: people who break other people's computers.

Computers Definitions People Things

Fifty percent of people have a below-average understanding of statistics.

People Science/Weather

More than 150 heads of state attended the UN Summit, giving New Yorkers a chance to get in touch with prejudices they didn't even know they had.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Characteristics People

Associate with well-mannered persons and your manners will improve; run with decent folk and your own decent instincts will be strengthened; keep the company of bums and you will become a bum; hang around with rich people and you will end by picking up the check and dying broke.

Characteristics Money Murphy’s Laws People

My doctor said, 'I’ve got good news and I’ve got bad news. The good news is you don’t have premenstrual syndrome; the bad news is… you’re a bitch!'

(1949 – ) American actress & comedian
People Self Situations

There's always something fishy about the French.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Insults People Places

I look at my friendship with her as like having a gall stone; you deal with it, there is pain, and then you pass it.

(1955 – ) American comedian, singer, actress & author
Insults People

You might be a redneck if… you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since "Smokey and the Bandit" was snubbed for best picture.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be good at taking orders.


Men Relationships Women

Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Appearance Body Dance People

Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they’ve got nothing to lose.

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor
Appearance Conflict Fights Individuals People Ugly

To err is human; to loaf, Parisian.

(1802 – 1885) French writer
People Places Work

A person who knows how to laugh at himself will never ceased to be amused.

(1934 – ) American actress, dancer, activist & author
Emotions Laughter People Self

Americans like fat books and thin women.

(1925 – ) columnist & journalist
Appearance Body Books Communication People Reading/Writing Women

I’m a man of no convictions… at least I think I am.

(1946 – ) British playwright, screen writer & film director
Characteristics People Self

If you do something right once, someone will ask you to do it again.

Murphy’s Laws People

A committee takes hours to put into minutes what can be done in seconds.

People Time

Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.

(1875 – 1965) German/French theologian, organist, philosopher, physician & medical missionary
People

We always admire the intelligence of those who ask us for advice.

(1927 – ) American lawyer, activist & public official
Intelligence People

To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Emotions Happiness Love People Women