Subject: People (Page 16)

People living in glass houses should not!

People Proverbs

They’re the only couples you’ll ever find poking around for ceramics and candle holders in the winery gift shop and both parties really want to be there.

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
People

Abstainer: A weak man who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Individuals Language

Intelligent people, when assembled into an organization, will tend toward collective stupidity.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People Stupidity Wisdom

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Characteristics People

I found a guy's wallet and inside was a picture of my kids!

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
People Things

A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Emotions People

The 100% American is 99% idiot.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
America Insults People

Men are like portable heaters that snore.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Men People

I hate to see a young man get ahead on the basis of a famous family name.

(1932 – 2009) U.S. senator (Massachusetts)
People Self Success

You might be a redneck if… anyone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, y’all watch this!”

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Family People Rednecks Situations

We are constantly being surprised that people did things well before we were born.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Activities Past People Time

Go to L.A. – they got gangbangers that will stab you, and then go to the corner and wait for the light to turn green.

American stand-up comedian
Conflict People Places

People ask me how much I weigh. I tell them, 145 pounds, naked; that is, if that scale outside the drugstore is anything to go by.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Appearance Self

There have been only two geniuses in the world – Willie Mays and William Shakespeare.

(1903 – 1968) movie actress
People

Where ignorance is bliss it's foolish to borrow your neighbor's newspaper.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Intelligence People Reading/Writing Stupidity

A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Individuals People

A man leaves a woman for another woman, but a woman leaves a man for herself.


Men People Relationships Women

The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People Stupidity

Friends are like fiddle-strings and they must not be screwed too tightly.

Friends People Proverbs

I play sports…no I don’t… what the f**k?

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Self Sports